


What Peter Wants

by ShadTastic



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Bottom Peter Parker, Bottom Peter Parker/Top Wade Wilson, Character Death, Dead Aunt May, Deadpool Thought Boxes, Deadpool being Deadpool, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, F/M, How Do I Tag, Hurt Peter Parker, Hurt Wade, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Mentions of Death, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Peter Has Issues, Peter Parker Acts Like a Spider, Peter is a Little Shit, Peter is depressed, Poor Peter Parker, Precious Peter Parker, Protective Tony Stark, Protective Wade, Sassy Peter, Slow Build, Spider-Man Interacting with New Yorkers, Steve is best pop, Superfamily, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony is best dad, Top Wade Wilson, Wade Has Issues, Wade Wilson Breaking the Fourth Wall, Wade Wilson Needs A Hug, wade can read peters thoughts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-11
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-03-03 17:26:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 36,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13346001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadTastic/pseuds/ShadTastic
Summary: Wade never  thought he'd  gain anything  from blowing his brains out for the thousandth time.  But, when he awoke to find himself able to read Spider-Man's thoughts, he began to think about it differently."Spidey has anyone ever told you, you have a wonderful brain?" The merc batted his eyes at the other, not like Peter could see."Excuse me?" Spider-Man turned to the mercenary,soon after stuffing a piece of his hotdog into his mouth.'What kind of weirdo is my best friend?'Deadpool gasped, squealing  like a school girl. "I KNEW you liked me!! I can't  believe you never told me I was your best friend!"Peter narrowed his eyes, chewing his hotdog. "I...didn't  say that out loud did I?"





	1. Tacos and Teenage Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure if this has been done before but here it is. 
> 
> Expect slow and sporadic updates because I am a college student with a full-time job. 
> 
> Enjoy! Be sure to review and tell me if you like it!
> 
> Parody fic on What a Girl Wants obvi

A parody on the movie “What A Girl Wants” with Wade being able to hear Spiderman’s thoughts. Thought it would be cute so I went with it. Has this been done before??

LET'S GO 

I don't own Marvel, so I don't own these characters.

~~~~~~

 

Wade Wilson AKA Deadpool was not a superhero. Contrary to what most would think, Deadpool was a mercenary. A person hired to off another one for a sum of cash, not someone you'd see rescuing damsels in distress or helping little old ladies cross the street. But, recently Deadpool had been cutting back on the killings, which was putting a rather large dent in his bank account mind you, for a certain web-slinging arachnid wasn't too keen on him killing people in his city. 

((I BETCHA SPIDEY WOULD LIKE IT IF WE BROUGHT HIM DINNER.))

{{ Mm, or maybe he'll find it creepy, like everything else we do around him.}}

The merc threw his hands hands up and whined. “Yah go out in your birthday suit ONE TIME and all of a sudden you're a public menace!! What a world we live in.” Wade huffed, leaning against one of New York's legendary mug alleys, waiting to see if he can get Spidey’s attention. “You think Spidey would mind if i ruffed up one of the bad guys for him?” He said, eyeing a man as he walked by.

((Only if you don't mind that I totally just jizzed in my pants at the idea of seeing spidey.))

{{You don't wear pants. You're a figment of his imagination. Also, you're disgusting. }}

((Ooh! My imagination is his imagination, I hope. It's awesome in our brain. Quick, let's imagine Spiderman as a stripper!))

{{-Like he'd go for our body anyway.}}

((Not if he's being PAAAIIIDDD~ With the right amount of money, ANYONE will be willing to get it on with us!))

Deadpool slapped some hands over his masked ears and groaned. “Guys, come on. I'm trying to focus here, stop making me think of Spiderman in a thong. “

“-Who in a thong?” A voice suddenly said above him, making the merc yelp in a totally manly way. 

He looked up seeing none other than the wallcrawler himself perched on the building's edge. “Whoa, baby! Give a guy a little warning next time, yeah?” Wade rubbed his forearm and tilted his head. “Whatcha doing in this neck of the woods, anyway?”

The hero's lenses narrowed and he flipped off the side landing beside the merc. 

Deadpool held up a finger. “Okay, one HOT. Two, what's with the face, baby boy?”

With a sigh, Spiderman placed his hands on his hips, motioning to Wade. “You'd know, right? Afterall you only wait here all night hoping I'd swing by.” 

“-And it worked, you're here. “ Wade fist-pumped the air near a clearly agitated Spidey. “Score one for Deadpool.”

Peter crossed his arms, annoyed. “And how many points did you say I had last time we talked about this?” 

Wade hummed, grinning under his mask. “One for being such a good boy, one for being one of the only people who can tolerate me, and 10,000 big macs for that sweet ass of yours.” He made grabby hand motions towards Peter, who growled and kicked him in the shin.  
Deadpool yelped, holding onto it,leaning over and hopping on his free foot. “Ooh and another 10 for that killer Black Widow kick, baby!”

The superhero scoffed, rolling his eyes under his mask..”She didn't invent that, you know? PLENTY of kickass females have done it before, ever hear of Tomb Raider? Anyway, I'm going now, just came by to make sure you weren't..you know, killing someone in this back alley.” He awkwardly shuffled his feet, which made Deadpool nearly swoon. Spidey was definitely a young man from the way he talked and acted, an awkward, sexy, ADORABLE, young man that the merc wanted to squeeze. 

“-Now that I know you weren't, uh good job and everything. I gotta go.” 

Sensing Spiderman’s departure, Deadpool held out a hand towards him to get his attention once more. “Wait! Uhm..” He froze when the hero turned to look at him. “Are you hungry? We could go get some food! I know this great mexican place that has the BEST tacos you will ever eat. Scouts honor.” 

He saw the younger man freeze, seeming to think on the offer. “Hmm.. no can do, I need to head out on patrol now. I just started a little while ago.”

The merc whined a bit, thinking of another excuse to hang with the hero. “Well, maybe we can patrol together and afterwards go get some awesome kickass pancakes?”

A small chuckle was heard. “Deadpool, it's already 3 in the morning.”

“it'll be the breakfast of champions! From one super sexy hero to the other! Also, you weren't exactly opposed to tacos at 3am. Come on, what do you say?” 

Spidey studied him, silent, making Wade fidget slightly under his gaze. Finally, after what felt like a century the man sighed and shook his head. “Deadpool, I can't right now. Maybe another time.” And with that, he swung away leaving the merc still standing with his hand reached out. 

“Yeah,” The older male said with a dejected sigh, knowing the other couldn't hear him. “.. maybe…”

{{Like I said, who would want to go out with that kind of face?}}

((NOT ME. NOT ME. Maybe Freddy Krueger though! You two could be twinsies! Or we totally ARE Freddy and just don't know it yet. GASP. Plot twist, get some knives quick!))

{{....Didn't Freddy Krueger molest/kill children? }}

(( OKAY, SO MAYBE NOT THAT GUY. BUT, WE TOTALLY LOOK LIKE HIM. No wonder Spidey wants nothing to do with us!))

Wade felt the cool press of his gun press up against his temple before a shot echoed through the alleyway and everything faded to blackness. 

 

~~~

Peter finished up patrol with little to no trouble that night. After his encounter with Deadpool, the hero had been a bit distracted thinking over what the mercenary had asked him. Did he really want to hang around him? The merc had clearly shown his interest in him in various circumstances over the past two years the had known each other and began talking on rooftops late at night. 

The brunette had to admit that Wade was good company occasionally. Especially when he had been out for hours already and was needing a pick me up. 

Still, that didn't change the fact that the man was dangerous, a mercenary, and that was a no no in Peter's book. Yet he found himself looking forward to their rooftop conversations when he'd go on patrol. They happened almost every night now and the hero would often wonder in his civilian life what the merc would come up with next. 

He felt bad about brushing him off last night, he'd make sure to talk to him about it tonight when they went to their rooftop. 

THE rooftop. Not... their, he totally didn't just think their when talking about them. Nope nope. 

Peter rolled his eyes, currently in the middle of one of his classes. He couldn't believe he was spacing out in class when he was finally able to show up to it and NOT exhausted. Damn Wade. Even when the mercenary wasn't with him he was STILL distracting. 

He placed his head on his hands, staring out one of the windows to his left. Would it really make much of a difference if he started hanging out with Wade more? They already have had many hang out sessions on rooftops, complete with food which was definitely Peter's favorite part after a long night fighting crime.

Perhaps he was overthinking it. Sure, the man was a mercenary, but he had been making progress on, well significantly less killing than before. Wade might not have thought he had noticed, but he had and really appreciated the effort the merc was putting in.

Maybe hanging out more could be a good idea. It could encourage the man to cease killing all together, an unlikely scenario, but one Peter would be happy with. 

With a small sigh, he peeked back up at the teacher lecturing at the front of the classroom. He tried paying attention to what they were saying, arguing with himself that this was the first class he had been able to make it to in close to a week, who knows when he'd get the chance again. 

~~~~~~

Wade awoke with a splitting headache and a gun still in his hand. “Agh, damnit. What the fuck happened last night?” He blearily looked up at the darkening sky and realized he had to have been at least five by now. “I slept the whole day? Fucking for real?” He grumbled, sliding himself up into a sitting position. 

((Well, lookie who's awakey!))

{{Not like it would matter much anyway, we knew we'd just get back up unhurt}}

Deadpool fake sniffled, rubbing under his mask covered nose. “No, I still hurt, just not physically.” 

{{Oh, grow up.}}

((I like when he cries!! ))

The merc rolled his eyes under his mask. With a groan he got up onto his feet, muttering about how he was getting old. “Whelp. I believe a shower is in order fellas, ready the loufa!!” He declared happily, running out of the alleyway, startling a few new yorkers as he went. 

~~~~~~

A few hours later, the merc had showered, fixed up and scrubbed his suit, and was currently scarfing down a few pizzas while watching his dvd set of Golden Girls. 

“Oh Bea Arthur, if only you were America's sweetheart instead of Betty White..” Wade sighed, leaning back against his ratty couch and glanced at the clock. “Oh shit, I need to get ready, Spidey should be ready to go out on patrol soon.” 

Stretching, he got into the suit part of his Deadpool costume, having already had the mask on and whistled. “Hey there, good-lookin!” He finger gunned his reflection with a mask covered grin. 

((Who's good-lookin??))

{{I think he means us…}}

All bravado leaked out of the mercenary when his boxes returned. “Ah, you guys are back now. Great, and here I thought I might've finally shot you guys out of my brain.” 

{{Hey, dumbass. We talked to you when you first woke up, remember?}}

Wade was in the process of strapping various weapons to his person. “Nope, don't recall and don't really care. I try to block you assholes out so I can have some sense of normalcy.”

((HAH. WHAT NORMAL...ACY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?))

{{*Normalcy. }}

The merc groaned, running a hand over his masked face. “I swear you guys are the worst.” He slammed open his apartment door and strolled out. “let's go find a spider in the big apple!”

Deadpool would never mention to anyone that it took him six hours to find the hero swinging through the city and even longer to convince him to stop for a chat. 

They currently sat, atop one of the many flat rooftops scattered across the city, a taco in hand, one in each for Wade, and were quietly munching on them. Wade dangled his feet off the side of the building, humming happily at the taste of artificial mexican meat in his mouth, is it racist to say that or stereotypical? Or is it both? Or is Wade totally bored thinking about the ethnicities of his tacos while spidey sat next to him silently looking off out to the city. 

‘I wonder if I should have brung my chem book with how quiet everything is tonight. My luck as soon as I did there would be twenty bank robberies and three police chases. Or, Wade wouldn't stop asking questions long enough for me to concentrate.’

The merc turned, face half stuffed with food and pointed to the hero. “You can always do your homework around me! I'll be a gentleman, honest!” He held up his hand in a scouts form. 

Peter raised a brow under his mask. ‘Did I accidentally say that out loud? Shit, I've got to be more careful about that, no more spacing out!’

With quick thinking, the hero responded after swallowing a bite from his taco. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

“Mmm nope. Can't fool me, Spidey! I heard you say chemistry book, are you a nerd. Tell me all the details!” Wade leaned closer nudging the smaller one with his arm. 

Spiderman glared at the mercenary. “Didn't you just say you wouldn't ask questions like that? That you would ‘be a gentleman’? Not that I particularly believe you would be.”

The older man's eyes were practically hearts from what the other had said. “You know from the way you talk sometimes, you sound like you'd be WAAYYYYYYY smart. I betcha you get all the girls, huh Spidey?”

Said spider sighed, turning his gaze away. “I knew it. “ He took another bite of his taco and chewed. 

‘I can't believe I even thought for a second he could be a gentleman. ‘

After a few seconds of silence, Peter felt a stare burn into him from his peripheral and promptly turned, mouth full and madea show of tilting his head. A clear sign that spidey was just about done with the man's creep factor today.  
‘What the hell is he still staring at me for?’

Wade blinked. That...was twice now that Wade had watched the man talk without moving his lips. The first time he thought it might've been a fluke, like he just wasn't paying attention or something. But, no. The second time he had for sure watched the hero take a bite of food and talk about him like he wasn't there without. moving. his. lips. 

To say he was freaking out would be an understatement.


	2. Peter beats someone with his mouth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Title says it all lol

Holy shit balls. Over 100 kudos on ch.1?! Damn guys!! Thank you! Back for chapter two!:D

I don't own Marvel or any associated with them. 

~~~~~~

Wade felt his taco slip through his hand and splat against the rooftop making the hero look down at it, confused. 

“Uhm...Wade? You doing alright, you kinda...dropped your food. Though, I wouldn't recommend eating it after that, knowing you, you most likely would.” Peter looked back up at the other, his lips formed into a pout as he set his own taco onto the napkin spread beside him. 

The mercenary shook his head, blinking a few times to try and clear his thoughts, of course it would've been a lot easier without two annoying voices in his head spouting out their opinions. 

(( EEEEEK!! O.M.G Did we totally just hear web’s thoughts?! ))

{{It seems that way yes. Though, WHY seems like a more appropriate question. Seems oddly plot convenient.}}

(( It's a cool idea though! ))

{{To know the thoughts of the one you love...how typical.}}

Wade let out a groan, had he really been staring at the other through that whole conversation? He ran a hand down his face, now actually focusing on Peter sitting beside him, seeing that the hero had turned away again and was staring up at the night sky. 

Once the boxes voices began to shut up, the merc began hearing a quiet voice echo in his head in their absence, which he now knows is Spiderman’s. 

‘-really messed up this time. I hope he's okay, but he can't die, right? He's not having a stroke, or paralyzed.. So why the hell is he staring at me and not answering?’

“Webs.. “ Wade said quietly. 

‘He seemed so distant, it's unlike him,usually he talks to himself but this was just silence..’

“Spiderman.” The merc tried once more, this time a bit louder. 

‘Should I try and poke him again? It was weird the first time because he didn't react at all! I don't think my adolescent angst-filled brain could take that kind of creep-’

Wade took a deep breath. “SPIDERMAN!” He yelled, giving a relieved sigh when the other jumped and finally turned to look at him. 

“You left for a bit there, something on your mind?” The older man tilted his head with a wide smile, already knowing the answer. 

Said hero huffed and pointed at Wade. “ME?! What about YOU? I tried getting your attention for like five minutes..you kept staring at me, you weirdo!” Spiderman crossed his arms and turned away with a pout. 

Oh my god, Wade could see the blush that had spread across the other's face that the mask couldn't hide, and the way he pouted...just, just his whole stance in general. The mercenary felt his heart squeeze. 

((He's so cute!! Can we keep him??))

{{He's too much of a good boy to date someone like us..}}

((Ohohoho! But those are always the most fun to corrupt and turn into fresh bad boys~♡ So adorable and smol..))

{{You're ridiculous. Why would he even be interested?}}

(( HELLOOO??? Have you SEEN the tags? We're totally gonna get laid!! Eventual Spidey-booty!))

“GUYS please.” Wade said under his breath making Peter look at him funny. 

“There you go talking to yourself again, at least that's something I'm used to from you, the boxes again?” the smaller man had scooted ever so slightly closer to Wade as the night air made him shiver. 

Wade nodded, noting the closeness of the other but not mentioning it in fear of him moving. “Yeah, they're being stupid. “

You see THIS was one of the reasons the merc absolutely ADORED Spidey. No one else has put up with him for so long, put up with his dumb bullshit, dicked around with him when he kinda needed a pick me up, and when he mentions the boxes, the hero just takes that shit in stride and acts as if it was totally a normal thing that Deadpool had voices in his head and sometimes talked aloud with them. 

Maybe one day...if they grew close enough, he might know who Spiderman really was. To finally be able to see what was surely to be a gorgeous face under that webbed mask. If, the younger man's smile was anything to go off of.

Which it was. His smile made Wade’s heart melt and his laughter was like bells. 

((Jesus FUCK, who the hell is writing this, a Sonic the hedgehog fan??))

{{I have many questions. }}

((Have you read some of that shit?? Makes me wanna hurl reading about Sonic suddenly falling head over heels for Amy because she gained a rack the size of Lady Tsunade’s.))

{{This...didn't answer any of them. If anything, I have more now. }}

Wade mentally slapped himself, now focusing on the laughing hero nearly in his arms and tried controlling the way his heart nearly beat out of his chest. 

The younger chuckled beside him, looking off into the city. “Oh yeah? Well, look who's talking..” 

Struggling for a moment to remember what the hell they were talking about before, Wade replied. “Hey! That's not nice… that was a pretty good movie, webs. I'd like to see you do better.” The merc poked Spidey’s shoulder making him turn and look at him. 

“A dumb movie about what a baby might be thinking? Yeah, I think I could. Here's an idea.. A mercenary and a superhero are on a rooftop eating enchiladas-”

“Enchiladas??? Blasphemy. Why enchiladas?” Wade interrupted. 

Spiderman slapped his arm for the interruption. “Copyright. I can't have a movie that's 100% the same as the original, that'd be bad with the legal system, you know?” 

“You'd know all about that wouldn't you, baby boy?” He teased watching the spider smirk. 

“Nah, I think YOU would mr. merc for hire~” Peter teased right back before clearing his throat. “Anyway. Two friends chilling out on a rooftop eating enchiladas when the hero gets up and says he wants to go home.” He got up and stretched before looking down at the merc. “So he went home to his shitty bed. The end.”

Wade pouted up at the other. Awe! You're leaving already? But, I still have three tacos left!” Peter promptly pointed to the one splattered on the rooftop and crossed his arms. “Two...Two tacos! Besides! If your bed is super shitty you can always come and share mine~” He waddled his brows at the hero who rolled his eyes and gave Wade a good kick to his thigh. 

“GOODNIGHT Wade.” Peter said, fighting a grin. 

“Wait wait wait! In all seriousness before you leave, you mentioned a chemistry book. PLEASE tell me you're legal and that I don't have the hots for a fifteen year old.” Wade pleaded to both the spider and every god he knew of that the answer was yes. 

Spiderman tapped his arms on his bicep and rolled his eyes. “Yes, I'm legal, Wade. Not that it'd do you much good.”

((MeOWCH.))

{{ I told you so. }}

Ignoring the comment, Deadpool tilted his head. “How uhm...how old are you?”

‘22.’

Peter stared down at the other through his white lenses and sighed. “I'm 25. Happy now? I'm going to go home to my bed now, I hear it calling me.” Spidey went to leave before seeming unsure and standing there looking off to the side. “But, uhm. Hey listen, before i go i just wanted to apologize for last night. I didn't mean to make it seem like I was blowing you off or ignoring you. I was just..a little I guess stressed out about a few things and just wanted to go home as quickly as possible. So, I'm sorry if i upset you. Well, uhm..g-good night.” With that the hero had jumped off the side of the building and shot a web at another, swinging away gracefully making Wade smile as he watched him go. 

“25 my ass. ” He said with a laugh. 

~~~~

Peter groaned into his pillow when the sun's light came through his shitty curtains and shone right in his face. He had just went to bed a few hours ago dammit, he wasn't a morning person by any means he didn't think he ever was either. The blaring horns outside in the busy streets of New York didn't help any as well.

“Whyyyyyy…. “ He shoved his pillow over his head and sighed. 

Not two seconds after he had relaxed back into his bed did an alarm blare on his phone on his dresser. 

On the other side of the room. 

“Why- WHY IT'S SATURDAY. Did i forget to turn it off?!” the brunette grew frustrated, not having his web shooters on to nab his phone so he decided to just push the pillow further down onto his head to block out the sound of Owl City's Metropolis at nine in the morning. 

After about a minute he let out a small shout and threw the pillow at his phone without getting up from his bed. 

The phone fell from the dresser with a loud clatter once it hit the ground and Peter's advanced hearing heard the distinct sound of something cracking. 

Immediately he shot up, turning to look over at where the phone lay face down with a look of horror. “No… No! Please not again, FUCK!” He got up and padded his way over and lifted up the phone, almost scared to turn it over and see the other side. 

‘Please Please Please…’ The young man thought over and over and prayed that when he turned the phone over it would miraculously be perfectly fine and totally not shattered like he feared it would be. 

The brunette cursed once he saw the horribly cracked screen and stomped his foot like a three year old. “Dammit dammit! FUCKKKKK!!!” A banging in his wall let him know his neighbor heard and was NOT happy. 

“Hey, could you maybe SHUT UP?! Some of us are trying to sleep!” The angry muffled voice screamed. 

Peter sighed, before angrily going over to his dresser and getting out some clothes. “Thank god, I have some money left from my birthday last month or I'd be fucked on this. It still might not be enough to fix it..” The adult sighed again through his teeth, running a hand through his wild locks. 

“God, I hope it's enough. This phone wasn't cheap. It was cheaper than getting fifty new phones every time I got drop-kicked into concrete, or thrown into the Hudson, but damn if it didn't hurt my wallet. Fuck me for being an ass and not putting the case back on last night. “

You might be wondering why all the swear words for such a smol innocent super boy. Well, the answer is simple. 

Peter Benjamin Parker is in no way or form innocent. Far from it, actually. 

He kept on a positive and optimistic attitude when in the suit for the kiddies that no doubt looked up to him now. He would keep everything he said PG and would never EVER do anything considered sexually risky when in the suit. Spiderman had to be a role model now, after all. But, when out of the suit, well...

Peter's been around the block a few times, he knows there will always be assholes that make him wanna beat the shit outta them. But, the cool thing about being a superhero is this little thing called MISPLACED AGGRESSION. The brunette can take A LOT of shit in his civilian life and take it out on the baddies he'd fight to relieve the stress and frustration of that fucker at the grocery store being racist. 

With the freedom of being masked, spiderman can be whatever person he wanted to be and that is a role model for children. Peter Parker, on the other hand was not a superhero, he was a nerd. 

 

...and nerds get picked on. A lot. 

So Peter, being the darling little devil he was, usually would respond with a less than kid friendly retort of “FUCK YOU.” Normally, he only responds with witt if someone is being an ass to him, he didn't particularly care, him being used to such treatment and all. 

But, god forbid if he sees some chuckle fuck doing it to someone else. Peter has been bullied his whole life and like hell was he going to watch it happen to someone else. 

So, here he was, in line at some super busy phone store that he clearly did not belong in. The phones were way over his budget and the only reason he could afford the waterproof phone he had was due to extensive saving. 

Everyone in the store looked WAY too prissy for Peter's tastes and their attitudes only made it worse. 

There was this asshole lady behind him, talking super loud about how the guy beside her was ugly and disgusting. 

“Like seriously, I would never go out in public like that. I would be too embarrassed, like oh my god. “ She prattled on to her stupid friend who only nodded in agreement and scrunched up her face. 

Peter closed his eyes, letting out a sigh through his nose and mouthed. “Like oh my god shut the fuck up.” He was not going to be kicked out of another place because of some stupid chick. 

He heard the man shuffle a bit closer to him, clearly trying to put some distance between him and the bitchy girls. Peter felt the man's side brush against his hip, making him turn slightly around to glance at the other. 

The taller man had a hoodie obscuring his face, and a pair of baggy sweatpants, but the man had his head tilted down, Peter not being able to see it because of it. But, nothing Peter saw on the man could possibly warrant this kind of bitchiness. 

The girl's were still behind the taller, now laughing when they saw he moved away. “See?! He's embarrassed too! Ha ha! What on earth..”

Peter watched them, growing more pissed off and annoyed by the second. He began repeating phrases in his head to calm him down, not noticing the other man look up at him then at his lips. 

‘Don't do it.’

“-Seriously..what a-” 

‘DON'T SAY ANYTHING.’

“-total..”

‘Swear to god, Parker.’

“-piece of ..”

‘I swear to god if that bitch says what I think she's going to say.’

“-absolute trash!” 

Ahhh Nope. That was the end of the fifteen minutes of PG Peter. Time for the Explicit Parker to the rescue, or sorta. 

Peter glared over at the girl's, stepping a bit closer and clapping his hands in their faces to get their attention. “Yo, hey, Hi. Name's Parker.” He feigned a nervous grin and waved.

The brunette almost felt pride by their disgruntled looks once they saw his nerd appearance. 

“Uhm, what do you want, loser?” The main biotch relayed, sticking her nose up slightly to Peter, who only grinned back. 

“Yeah. Uh quick question for you then I'll be outta your hair, gotta get a phone fixed and all.” He rambled a bit, just to see the annoyed looks on the teenager's faces. 

Or they could be adults, but Peter hoped not because then he'd worry for his future again and he did NOT need that kind of pressure right now. 

“Ah yeah uhm.. What the fuck is your problem?” He asked them, with a straight face, his faked nervous chatter deluding into his natural sass and irritation. 

The girl’s looked stupefied for a moment before their faces turned red. 

“EXCUSE ME-” The one that had been talking started but Peter held up a hand, effectively silencing her. 

“No, excuse ME. What the hell gives you the right to treat someone like they're dirt under your foot?! Because you're rich and can afford to buy this whole store, or maybe it's because of all the makeup you have caked onto your face so anyone who's never heard you talk THINKS you're beautiful?!”

The brunette heard the man now behind him let out a small chuckle, but the younger didn't notice the rest of the store's eyes on him. 

The girl was now completely pissed, and embarrassed by all the peering eyes. “You..You have NO right to talk to me this way! I'll have my dadd-”

Peter felt his eyes roll on their own volition. “Oh what, you'll have your sugar daddy sue me? Ain't got a dime to give you, I'm afraid. “ These dumbass rich chicks and their stereotypes. 

The woman's eyes widened and the hero knew he'd hit that right on the money. 

“-So maybe, instead of being an ass, you could go back home and see what your “Daddy” wants you to do. Sound good?” He tilted his head, watching the horror fill her eyes before she stormed out of the store with a flick of her hair, her satellite friend following close behind. 

 

Peter crossed his arms, feeling a smug smirk tug on his lips. “Thanks, have a nice day~” He waved at them. 

When he turned he saw the shocked eyes of the people in the store and the disapproving looks the workers at the counter were giving him. But you know what he didn't see, the man he had just stuck his neck out for. Yep, nowhere in the damn store. 

Well then, that was certainly a bit disheartening. Everyone that had previously been in front of the line had moved, clearly not wanting to mess with the nerd and Peter as casually as possible, walked up to the counter,ignoring the glares and placed his phone onto the counter. 

“Can you please fix, or replace my phone? My insurance on it should cover most of it. “ He stated, reaching behind him to pull out his wallet. 

The store clerk stopped him with a wave of his hand. “The insurance on our phones does not cover this kind of damage. Only protecting against certain types of malware and battery and camera functions. Sorry sir. I can't fix your phone with the help of your insurance. If you want to though, the repair costs on this specific phone's screen would be little over $400 dollars if you would like to pay that instead. “ The man behind the counter smiled, though it was anything but pleasant. 

Peter narrowed his eyes at the other. “I spent an hour on the phone before i bought this one with your company's insurance agent. To make SURE it would. Now, you're telling me you don't? Why's that?” He crossed his arms, now glaring at the clerk, who seemed unfazed. 

“Sorry, sir. But our policy clearly states-”

“Show it to me.” The hero interrupted, not wanting to listen to the worker's crap anymore. 

The man seemed a bit taken aback by the request and fidgeted, eyeing the people waiting in line. “Sir, there are many people waiting in line that would like to have their phones fixed to.”

Peter laid his arms onto the counter and propped his head on it. “Well, what a coincidence, so do I~ I'll wait on this side of the counter until you're ready to come up with another excuse for me to leave, if you want. “

The worker gave a nervous laugh. “Sir, I'm not..”

“Mmm…..yeah you're. Listen, dude. Don't like to me, just give it to me straight. You want me to leave because of the scene with biotch a few minutes ago, right? I'm I in the ballpark?” He made a shimmie motion before tilting his head at the worker who looked a bit off puted. 

“Yes, sir...I would like it very much if you would leave now.” He stated, lacking the air of confidence he had moments ago. 

Peter threw up his hands, grabbing his busted phone and started backing out of the store. “No worries, man. Was that so hard?” With that the young adult stalked out of the store with an annoyed grunt. 

“Great, not only did she make me look like an asshole, she also made me not be able to get my phone fixed.” He grumbled, walking down the sidewalk. 

“I can fix your phone for you.” A deep, gruff voice responded suddenly from behind him. 

“JESUS FU- DUDE! “ Peter laid a hand on his rapidly beating heart, having turned to the man who was in the store earlier. “Don't scare me like that! Jeez. Anyway, what'd you say? I thought you had skedaddled your way outta here after that whole mess. I know I would have.”

At the man's stare, Peter gave a small chuckled, rubbing the back of his head. “Clearly I'm a sensitive guy. But, I can't stand when someone is being treated like that. Hits too close to home, you know?” the hero felt himself rambling, why the hell was he nervous? “Anyway, I'm sorry if I freaked you out or scared you, whatever. I just wanted them to be taught a lesson.”

The man continued to stare, making the smaller squirm slightly. 

“Thank you.” Was what was said after a few seconds of awkward silence, making Peter look up at the other's covered face. 

He hummed, rubbing at his arm. “Well, you're welcome. As I said it's no problem.”

‘Except that my phone can't be fixed but that's not your fault.’ the smaller thought to himself. 

He didn't see the way th other's eyes went spectacularly large. “What...uhm what did you say? Sorry, I wasn't paying attention.” The gruff voice said after a moment's pause. 

Peter nearly rolled his eyes, and couldn't help but feel like he's been in this situation before. 

“I said you're welcome, dude. It's no problem.” He shrugged, giving a small smile to the taller, damn he really was a lot taller than him. 

The other seemed to hesitate before clearing his throat and sticking out a horribly scarred hand, gauging Peter's reaction to it. “Name's Wade. What's yours?”

Ther hero blinked at the hand, not expecting that before gripping it firmly in his own and shaking. “My name is Peter. Nice to meet you, Wade.”

Wade stood, a bit shell-shocked by the other's clear disregard for his scars and felt a smile stretch across his face. “Yeah...nice to meet you too, Pete.”

The other scoffed, rolling his eyes. “It's Peter. Not Pete.” He playfully smirked at the scarred man. 

Wade scrunched up his nose, VERY happy with the turnings of this conversation. “You say something, Petey? I couldn't hear you over the screaming fangirls.”

Peter snorted, covering his mouth with his hand. “What even, Wade?” He tried to stop giggling, feeling embarrassed that a complete stranger had gotten him to laugh quicker than most of his friends could. 

‘Man, this feels so familiar. Doesn't help that his name is Wade too. Heh, weird, I'll have to tell him about it maybe.’

He noticed the other freeze and stare at him once more before Peter quit laughing and lifted a brow. “What is it?” He tilted his head, watching Wade seem to come back from his trip to space. 

Wade’s mind reeled for a minute before he pointed to the phone in the brunettes pocket. “I uh.. I have a buddy of mine that owes me a favor. He can fix your phone right up, no charge. Consider it a thank you for sticking up for a guy like me.” 

“A..guy like you? Uh, okay. You really don't have to. I'll find a-” Peter had started before Wade placed his scarred hands on his shoulders. 

He pleaded to the smaller, blue eyes wide, thought he wasn't quite sure if Peter could see it. “Please? We can exchange numbers, and I'll get ahold of my guy to fix your phone. I'd feel terrible if I let you walk away without fixing your phone. Especially since it was my fault you couldn't. “

Peter immediately shook his head. “It wasn't your fault, dude. Trust me, I've been kicked out of more stores than I can count because of my mouth. Another isn't going to kill me.”

The bigger man chuckled. “See? We already have something in common. Like tacos?” He tilted his head. 

Peter pulled out his phone, not answering verbally until he unlocked it his phone and looked up at him. “So, let's exchange numbers. Switch me?”

“Yeah, hang on.” Wade said,pulling out his own device from his hoodie and they switched, entering in their information. 

‘Hot damn that deep voice. Gonna be the death of me. Urk, focus, Parker.’

Wade bit his lip to keep from laughing when the other's thoughts projected in his head. 

Once they exchanged numbers, Wade texted Peter a smiley just because and smiled. 

Peter shuffled on his feet, biting his lip, dear god that lip. “So, I gotta go now, but it was nice hanging out in the front of the phone store. I'll talk to you later, Wade. “

Wade grinned, waving to the other. “Seeyah, Petey! I'll be sure to text you the deats when my friend gets back with me. We'll fix that phone right up!”

The other chuckled. “Heh, yeah. Hey, before I go, I have to ask about your uhm..condition.”

Wade instantly felt the frown etch into his face. This was it, the pity, the disgust and he'll turn away from him just like everyone else, even after he found out something rather interesting about Peter. 

Well, there were many interesting things about the brunette, but Wade was talking mainly on how he can hear the other's thoughts like a certain arachnid hero. Which was making Wade VERY...suspicious.

But, now Peter was going to hate him. Because of how he was, his scars, everyone eventually did once they saw him. He braced himself for the blow and nodded to the other. “Y-Yeah?”

Peter crossed his arms. “”Dude, why the fuck are you wearing socks with sandals. What kind of delinquent wears SOCKS with their SANDALS. Seriously, Wade not a good look on anyone. “ He shook his head with a smirk when he saw the surprise on the other's face. “It's criminal. Anyways. Bye dude.” And with that the brunette turned and started walking down the sidewalk once more, feeling the other's stare as he turned the corner. 

Wade felt a goofy grin appear on his face. “Soulmates.”

((HE'S PERFECT.))

{{He's small, and fiesty. I like him.}}

The merc let out a chuckle before looking at his phone which now showed a “:V” text from Peter whom Wade changed the name from ‘Peter’ to ‘Baby boy.’   
“So do I.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it obvious I don't like Sonic or Naruto.I ddon't like a lot of things buy those are two of them.


	3. April   Showers Make Peter Bring May Flowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Might explain a few things about wth Peter is such a little shit right now, I needed to give him a push to stop being so reserved. This is the result of that push.

Ch. 3!!

I don't own these characters. Marvel does. 

~~~

Peter had felt nervous once he rounded the corner. What the hell had gotten into him? He'd gotten into fights here and there, sure but he'd never done THAT before. He'd almost taken that lady's head off and he insulted her on stuff he knew nothing about!

While it was still wrong of her to say such things about Wade, he shouldn't have hounded on her like that. He could get into SERIOUS trouble for that! Needless to say Peter felt like garbage, he was supposed to be a hero, a role model for people and he basically verbally assaulted a lady because of her rude words. 

He couldn't blame it on his broken phone either, while it had been a crappy start to his Saturday, he shouldn't have been as agitated about it. What if he had accidentally hurt her? Goodbye superhero, hello prison. 

Peter sighed once he shut the door to his apartment and slid down the door, running his fingers through his hair. “ I can't believe I did that.. and I felt PROUD afterwards, oh my god!” He grit his teeth, a whine escaping his throat. 

“- And now I have this random guy's number, he could be a criminal himself! That's a horrible assumption about a person I don't know, but it could be true!” He tugged at his hair in frustration. 

“God, what the hell is wrong with me?!” Aunt May would never have accepted this. If she was still here she would've given him such a lecture. 

But, she wasn't here anymore and she hadn't been for nearly two years now. Peter let out a shuttered breath, at the mention of his aunt. He had been busying himself with other stuff on purpose so he wouldn't have to think about her, he knew this was wrong and he should want to remember his aunt and he does, just..he can't. Not right now, not so soon afterwards. Peter knew he was acting almost identical to when Gwen had died but in a way this was different. Aunt May was the only person he had left at that point. His biological parents had left him when he was six, Uncle Ben when he was fifteen, Gwen when he had just turned eighteen, and to have Aunt May go when he was just a bit over nineteen? No, it was too much, and Peter could feel himself slipping again.

-and THAT was a path he did NOT want to go down. Not again. 

It had already been two years. Two whole years since his aunt was lost to him, and he already struggled to remember her voice, the way she smelled of flowers, even the beautiful hazel eyes of hers. He was scared of forgetting her but he was also scared of remembering. His thoughts drifted to the night in the hospital, to one of the last nights he had with her and violently shook his head to rid himself of them. No, no not again. 

He felt his breathing pick up, nearly hyperventilating, and he scrambled for his phone in his pocket,feeling the start of another attack. ‘Tony, call Tony. He can help.’

After a few rings a muffled voice slurred. “Eerr...hello?” 

Peter blinked, calming down some at the sound of his father figure. Why did he sound so tired it was, oh right it was only a little after 10 no wonder Tony sounded like he was nearly dead, he'd probably stayed up til six this morning on another project. 

“Tony, it's Peter…” He whispered into the phone, holding it against his cheek. 

The voice on the other end grew more alert, but still sounding tired. “Pete? What's going on, you haven't called in a few weeks..” The billionaire gave a few coughs on the other end. 

The hero ran a hand down his face, damn him and his social issues. “I know I know..i'm sorry Tony. But I really need to talk with you.. I think it might be happening again. I went nuts at this lady in the phone store and gave my number out to a stranger-”

Tony gave a grunt, pinching the brim of his nose at the kid's rambling. “Peter. Pete, come on. It's alright, just come down here to the Tower and we'll talk alright. Steve will probably end up making those pancakes you like so much. “

Peter sniffled a bit. “The blueberry ones?” He whispered and flushed when he heard his dad's chuckle. 

“Yes, now get you ass over here, kid. We'll talk then. Love yah.” And with that the line was cut and Peter was once again left alone to his thoughts. 

 

He sighed, leaning back against the door and stared at his dark apartment, the only light source being the sun peaking through his crappy curtains. 

“God…I really have been an ass lately, I haven't talked to MJ in over a week and she is not going to be happy about that when I do finally contact her..” He hadn't even contacted his own adoptive parents! He didn't speak to anyone at the tower for weeks! What the fuck was his problem. 

Come a few years ago, before the death of his Aunt, Peter would've never acted in such a way, as he said before he got into scuffles now and again, if we're being honest they were mostly with Flash, but they were never that bad and he'd never use someone's weaknesses against them like that, he certainly wouldn't have ever stereotyped someone's life with a basic look. 

The old Peter would have responded to that girl with something like this…

“Excuse me. Yes, could you stop harassing him? That's not a very nice thing to do.”

The old Peter got to crap beat out of him a lot, but it was okay because he was Spiderman and Spiderman can take a hit. 

Ever since his aunt passed away, issues with her heart, Peter had changed and not for the better. 

People around him tried to help but it would usually just result in Peter snapping at them and then apologising later nearly in tears, frustrated with how he was acting. 

Everyone understood this and forgave the young hero, but people that didn't know how Peter once was didn't understand his actions. They thought he was an asshole and a dick. 

Flash had even said he was disappointed in him, saying out of all people he never expected Peter Parker to become a bully. 

Needless to say Peter hadn't slept well that night. 

Tony and Steve had been helping him though, everyone at the tower really, they really had been trying their best to give him comfort while also giving him the space he needed and yet he still ran away, not taking the calls, not answering their messages.

God, he was such an asshole. 

Now here he was, calling them up and asking for help and they take it in stride, wanting nothing more than to help him. He was blessed with such wonderful people in his life and yet he always pushed them away. 

He couldn't use the excuse of being Spiderman anymore, the only person who knew he was Spiderman and wasn't a superhero themselves or dead, is Mary Jane, and she's on broadway. 

Peter had no excuse for his actions except for the extreme agony he felt when he was alone. 

The hero curled up by his door, hiding his head into his knees and letting out a shaky breath. He will not cry. He promised he wouldn't anymore. 

He will not cry.

He will not….

Peter let out a choked sob when he felt the tears slide down his cheeks. Dammit, he was useless, one of his only promises to his aunt after her passing and he breaks it. 

All because of his stupid mood swings. 

He wiped at his eyes, groaning when they burned and were most likely puffy. The hero couldn't help but be reminded of one of the last times he had cried like this even after trying so hard not to. 

~~~~

 

Peter sat held onto his aunt's pale hand and squeezed gently. He wasn't going to let her go. Not like this..

She was currently sedated, hooked up to a ventilator that was basically breathing for her. Her form looked so frail and her skin was cold to the touch. 

The doctor had said that she had experienced a very severe case of heart palpitations in the middle of the night. While the man had said they were normally harmless, with May’s already weak heart, the increased heartbeat while she slept was enough to push her into a full blown heart attack. 

Peter had never been so furious and so grateful for his Aunt's heart alert system she kept to her wrist. Within minutes the medics were ready in the ambulance with her and helping her through what was happening. 

But, it wasn't enough,her heart was too weak and the stress from the lack of blood pumping caused her lungs to fail and the oxygen levels in her blood to lower to a dangerous rate. 

So, there she lay, strapped up to the machine that was the only thing keeping her alive right now. Looking the weakest Peter had ever seen her. 

He had been called around an hour after they had finally stabilized her. He had been in bed, having gotten back to his apartment after patrol when the phone had rang. Of course he had jumped up, swinging his way to the hospital not giving a damn about about his secret identity at the moment and rushed into her room. 

At the time she had been awake, although barely, having the scheduled breaths pump in and out of her as she moved her tired eyes over to her nephew and gave the weakest smile that had shattered his heart. 

“Peter…” She had said as best as she could through the mask on her face. 

He was instantly at her side, twining his fingers in hers and kissing her hand. “I'm here, Aunt May.. I'm here…” the teen whispered, looking down at his aunt. 

The woman gave a light squeeze to her Peter's hand. “Peter...I have to ask something of you.” She said after a bit of struggle, making the man bite his lip to keep from crying out. 

“Anything, May…” He said softly, looking into her warm, tired green eyes, as if it would be the last time he'd see them. 

“Peter..please promise me…” She started. “Promise me that when I go...you won't go too…” His aunt whispered, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. 

At the mention of passing Peter's eyes stung with his own tears, but he fought them back for right now. 

“Aunt May...I can't….not you. Please not you! I've already lost my parents, Uncle Ben, and even Gwen. I CAN'T lose you too! I know I'm being selfish but I...I don't know what I'll do without you…” He sniffled, laying his head on the bed to avoid his aunt seeing him cry. 

“You're all I have left… please don't leave me…” he whispered into his arm. 

“Peter..” His aunt whispered, running her bruised thumb over his hand to get his attention. Once he looked up at her she gave him the best smile she could. “Please….you have to. Live on for me, for everyone. Richard and Mary, Ben, and Gwen...live on for us Peter. Because if continue to live, then we will too ..through you.” Weakly, she placed her free hand on top of Peter's own and gave it a small pat. 

“I just want...you to be happy..I don't want you to be like how you were when Gwen passed. Please for me...Just don't cry anymore...okay?” She wiped a few stray tears off of Peter's cheek when he leaned down to give her a kiss on the forehead. 

“You make it sound like you're not going to get better, May...you're going to walk out of here just fine…You'll see…”He rubbed his hand over hers and ran his fingers through her tangled hair. His throat close up, almost choking he replied. “I know you will.”

After a brief coughing session, the sweet woman looked at her distressed nephew and shook her head. “No, Peter..This is it for me.. the doctors say I can't breath on my own anymore..I can't go home with broken lungs, honey..” 

Peter stood, his eyes flashing. “There must be SOMETHING! Anything we could do!!” He ran a hand through his hair and cried, desperate. 

“Anything..” He whispered, mainly to himself. 

A noise that sounded suspiciously like a laugh came from his May. Peter looked back down at her and whimpered when she smiled at the man she had raised. 

“You silly boy...I've already told you what you can do..”

Peter held his breath, shaking his head at his aunt who tapped him on the wrist. 

“Live for me.”

That was the last time Peter had heard his Aunt's sweet voice and the last time her eyes would ever be open. 

So there he sat at the hospital bed, rubbing his thumb over his aunt’s small hand, fighting back the tears that gathered in his eyes seeing her sleeping peacefully despite the different things hooked up to her.

He used his free hand to gently stroke May’s cheek. “Hey, Aunt May..I'm here again...I just wanted to let you know that i-”

Peter faltered, voice wavering as tears spilled from his eyes. “-that i..love you very much...and that..it's okay.”

The man ran his fingers through his aunt's hair and gave a watery grin. “It's okay to let go...I know you're only still here for my sake, and I know..” He let out a sob, laying his head on the hospital bed. “..I know that you're stubborn and are holding on so long for me..but I'm telling you now..you don't have to..I'll be okay, I promise. “ He sobbed into the hospital bed, the words coming out uncontrollably with his cries. “I won't let you and everyone else down. I'm going to be strong.”

His aunt would pass away that night, and Peter never knew he'd be strong in all of the worst ways. 

~~~~

The hero was openly sobbing into his arms at this point, heaving air through his labored lungs and hiccuped. “Oh god, oh god, oh god…” He muttered over and over again, trying to calm himself down. 

Peter felt the buzz of a text message and only glanced down to see a meetup notification from Wade, he shook his head with a pitiful laugh and lifted his head up out of the cocoon he had made himself into just as a knocking was heard at his window.

Debating whether or not to actually check it out, it seemed he was given no option as the banging started back up again. With shaky legs, Peter stood up, wiping his eyes and running a few fingers through his hair and walked over to the window, pulling back the curtains where he was immediately greeted with the glare from an ironman suit. 

The young adult narrowed his eyes at the suit, crossing his arms. “Is that really you in there or auto-functioning through JARVIS?”

“Holy hell, kid you look like shit. “ The place mask lifted up to reveal the one and only Tony Stark who looked ragged and tired. 

Peter's eyes widened when he saw his father was actually in the suit. “Wow, it's actually you this time.” He turned his head away from the other's worried amber eyes and found something interesting to look at on his bedside table.

“I thought we agreed that you'd come down to the tower to talk with us, Pete, it's been nearly two hours since we got off the phone Steve was worried sick. “

Holy shit, Peter really had no idea he sat by the door for so long. Had it really been two hours already?

Tony looked at him with a disapproving stare and waved a metal plated hand in front of his son's face. “Peter. Hey, Pete. Come on, grab your things, we're going to the tower to talk about this. You look like you suffered a breakdown.”

Peter didn't even try denying that and began to meekly gather a few things and shoved them into his backpack. His costume, web shooters, phone, phone charger, etc. He walked back over to Tony who was still hovering at his window, attracting the attention of the many New Yorkers outside. 

He lifted a brow. “I'm going to have people asking me questions for WEEKS if I go with you right now. COULDN'T you have, I don't know, maybe used the door?”

“Well you should've thought about that before you waited two hours and left me alone with a stressed out Steve. Besides, this was quicker I was already in the lab when Steve asked me to come get you.” His father grabbed onto Peter's outstretched hand and grabbed it firmly, holding the smaller male against him. Tony quickly took off into the air once he saw the brunette was safely strapped to him. 

Peter rolled his eyes, them still being red and puffy from his earlier crying. “I see, so you didn't come here to see how your darling son was doing on your own volition. How typical.” 

Tony swatted his son on the arm for the comment. “Hush, grumpy. When we get to the tower Steve is going to smother you and who will you have to save you? No one with that attitude.”

Peter gave a light chuckle, looking out at the city streets below, enjoying the wind blowing through his hair. “My hero~” He swooned, dramatically draping an arm over his forehead. 

Ironman only glanced at him, seeing the tower coming up. “You've been hanging out with Deadpool too much.”

This made the hero look at his father. “What why do you say that?”

“Because you're starting to act just like him, you know. I still don't see what you like about him.” They touched down onto the launchpad and Peter pulled away with a smirk. 

“He's funny, got a sexy bod, and he's a good friend. “ He finger gunned his way down to grab his bag, laughing when Tony had taken off the suit and was rolling his eyes. 

“My poor insane son.” the genius sighed, walking down to the elevator, Peter following behind him. He'll admit, he's missed having the smaller with him. 

“...did you just quite Invader Zim at me?” the younger had whirled around and furrowed his brow. 

Tony smirked, crossing his arms as the elevator started descending to the avengers floor. “Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. You'll never know for sure, twirp.”

“Good morning, Mr. Stark, Mr. Parker. Pleasure to see you again, Mr.Parker. “ JARVIS said through the intercom. 

The smaller rolled his eyes with a grin. “Just Peter, JARVIS. Mr. Parker makes me sound old.”

He barely heard Tony scoff and and mutter a “Bullshit” under his breath before crossing his arms..

Peter chuckled, pulling out his phone, seeing about two dozen new messages from Steve. He scrolled through them, but didn't reply, he was going to see him in a few minutes anyway so there was no need for him to answer. He went to Wade’s message and saw he had in fact messaged him the details on his friend that could fix his phone. 

“My friend Weasel can fix your phone, asshole finally responded. If you want we can meet you somewhere, it shouldn't take him long at all to fix up your phone.” 

Another message was sent about ten minutes after the first one. “How about at a nice mexican place since i know you area a lover of tacos as well?”

He replied simply this “What the fuck kind of name is ‘Weasel’? :P”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also this really hits close to home because my mammaw is in the same situation. Everything went dostn on Monday, now we're lucky If she'll still be here by Saturday. 
> 
> So, I thought it would help me come to terms if I had someone to sympathize with.


	4. Breakdown the breakdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter needs a hand coping with his actions.

Ch.4!

 

I don't own these characters, just the story.

 

~~~~

 

The first thing Peter had felt when they entered the Avenger’s floor was being hugged to death by a worried Captain America.

 

“S-...Steve, you're crushing me! “ He wheezed, arms trapped under the large ones of his pops. 

 

He heard a snort from further into the room and saw Clint idly sitting on the table, staring at them. “Yeah right, kiddo. I've seen you get crushed by a building and nearly come out unscathed.”

 

Right after that comment, Tony popped up with his own two cents. “Plus we've had to deal with...THIS.” He motioned to the clearly distressed Steve that was fretting over Peter. “-for the past two weeks. You can deal with a hug, Pete.”

 

Said superhero groaned and allowed his other adoptive father to snuggle the life out of him. 

 

The taller blonde gave his son's head a smack when he pulled away, ignoring the yelp in favor of crossing his arms and glaring at the shorter. 

 

“Two weeks, not a call. Really, Peter? “ Steve said in his authoritative tone, making Peter mutter and sheepishly rub at his arm. “You look so skinny, have you been eating well? Wait, actually don't answer. You'll be eating here anyway, so at least I can watch and make sure you do.” Steve began walking back into the kitchen but not before pointing at his son and narrowing his eyes. “Don't think you've escaped talking about everything either. We're talking about it as a family and I swear to god, if you try to wiggle out of it I'll tie you to your bed with metal bars. “

 

Peter gulped. “Yes, Pops.” He looked at Tony with a pout. “Dad, I'm scared. Well, of many things, but right now I'm most afraid of Steve.”

 

Tony chuckled, patting the other on the back. “Well, make sure you call sooner than two weeks next time, kiddo.”

 

They went over to the table and sat down, Peter propped his head up and sighed, glaring at Clint, who was sitting ON the table still in front of him. 

 

Essentially, the man's ass was in his face and he was tempted to shove him off and watch him hit the floor. Well, maybe he'd fall, the man was a trained assassin. Odds are PETER would somehow end up on his arse. 

 

Said man wiggled his eyebrows down at the younger. “Sup, Webs. See something you like? I do parties.” Clint gave a snicker while the brunette rolled his eyes. 

 

“What? As the clown?” The smaller smirked at him before throwing out an arm and knocking the man off the table, grunting in annoyance when he landed on his knees and not his face.

 

“SHIT-...Oh I'm fine.” Clint smirked superiorly up at the other. “Betcha you're disappointed about that, spidey~” The archer snickered getting up off the floor and pulling out a chair, dramatically making a show of staring at Peter as he sat down. 

 

“CLINT BARTON, I BETTER NOT HAVE HEARD WHAT I THINK-” A loud booming voice broke the weird silence from behind them in the kitchen. 

 

Said archer rolled his eyes. “YOU'RE IMAGINING THINGS. “ He sighed, shaking his head. “I'm an angel..”

 

Peter scoffed, shaking his head. “Well, if you're an angel, then either I'm blind or you're blind. I think It's more of you being uhm what's the word? DELUSIONAL. “

 

Just as the blonde went to respond, the loud booming voice of Thor came through the door. “AH, YES. MAN OF SPIDERS I HAVE MISSED YOU, WAITING PATIENTLY AS EVER FOR YOUR VALIANT RETURN. “

 

A loud slap came from the large hand that had hit Peter's shoulder, everyone else winced for the young man, but Peter himself just grit his teeth and smiled up at his uncle. “Ahh...yep. I'm back. It's good to see you, Thor.” 

 

Clint muttered something involving poptarts, making Peter scrunch up his nose in confusion. Luckily, Thor hadn't noticed the change in expression. 

 

“YOU MUST ACCOMPANY ME BACK ON MY NEXT TRIP TO ASGARD. AS OF NOW, YOU REMAIN THE ONLY ONE WHO HASN'T BEEN TO MY HOME.” The god chuckled, squeezing his nephew’s shoulder and sat himself down at the table on his other side. 

 

The brunette chuckled. “Yeah, we'll have to plan a date.” He looked over at Tony, pleading at him with his eyes. 

 

Said man shook his head with a smile and mouthed ‘you earned this’. The billionaire chuckled when he saw his son's pout. 

 

Thor gathered Peter's attention again with a gentle hand on his shoulder, a vast improvement from the hard slap before. “IF I MAY ASK, YOUNG ONE. WHAT HAD KEPT YOU AWAY FOR SO LONG?”

 

The super bit his lip, ducking his head to shy away from his uncle's concerned gaze. “Uhm… well you know a few things came up and…. I just...didn't think to...come back.” He finished with a whisper, missing the way the room occupants frowned at him. 

 

“Yes, Yes, you forgot, now if the two of you nuts could PLEASE let me and my husband have a conversation with our son ALONE?” Tony gave a half-hearted glare to the archer. 

 

And naturally Clint looked offended. “Why are you looking at me like that for? Nat’s been here the whole time!” 

 

Peter jumped when he felt a slender hand rub his shoulder and looked behind him to see his Aunt was in fact in the room. “Aunt Natasha, when did you get here?”

 

Hawkeye rolled his eyes and hit the table before she had a chance to respond. “I just said she was here the whole time, Pete. Don't you believe me?” As the man continued with his ranting, Peter smiled up at his aunt and placed his small hand on hers. 

 

“How's it going?” He whispered lamely, not missing the way her eyebrows furrowed. With a nervous chuckle, Peter shrugged his shoulders at her silent question. “I couldn't think of anything else to say…”

 

The woman smiled and patted his shoulder before sliding into the seat beside Clint, ignoring Tony’s protests of a ‘family’ meeting. 

 

Black Widow sent a hard gaze the former playboy’s way and gave a tight smile when she saw him tense up under her gaze. “Malen'kiy pauk IS family. As far as I am concerned, we were all worried about him.”

The redhead gave a pat to her nephew's shoulder and smiled at him once she saw his sheepish look. 

 

Nat had given him the nickname once he had started staying with the avengers for a while. It was shortly after Aunt May had passed, and Tony and Steve became like fathers to him, Tony especially knowing the pain of losing a parental figure. It was easy to meld into life at the tower with them, they had long since figured out who Spiderman was, so having Peter there didn't feel as awkward. But, that still didn't mean being called “Little Spider” was anything other than embarrassing. He was a full grown man dammit, he wasn't little. 

 

Peter thought about all of the men he was close with and flushed under the gaze of his aunt. Okay, maybe he was tiny for a guy, but it helped him stay nimble and fit into vents. Everyone else around him was just strong to be strong. 

 

He wouldn't admit it anytime soon, but his mind went to Deadpool and his body for a moment. 

 

The hero shifted his eyes to his lap, where his hands had been nervously messing around with the tablecloth. 

 

He didn't like Wade. 

 

A hand broke him out of his thoughts, making him jump slightly. “Ah-! What? What's going on?” Peter looked about the room seeing he had caught everyone's attention including Steve's who had walked in with the food ready. 

 

“Are you ready to talk about it?” The soldier's surprisingly soft voice called to him, lulling him into a false sense of security. That is until he realized he was now going to have to explain himself and Peter didn't think he was really up for that. 

 

With a gulp, the brunette’s hazy brown eyes were looking at his hands. “I uhm.. I don't know where I would start, if I'm honest…” He stated. 

 

Tony grumbled, fork swirling in syrup. “How about why you haven't returned any calls for two weeks and then suddenly I get a call and you're having a breakdown?” The genius received a slap on the arm for his brashness. “What? That's a perfectly good place to start. We've all been worried sick and clearly Pete hasn't been doing too good.”

 

“Tony, it's a more gentle subject than tha-” Steve had started before he was interrupted by a very determined Peter. 

 

“-No. No, Tony’s right. I'm SORRY, I haven't attempted to keep any contact, I thought maybe… maybe I could handle it on my own…” the young man gripped at his pant leg. “I kept thinking, if I could just get over this and show everyone I can be grown up and capable of being on my own again… But, I was wrong to do it that way and I'm sorry. My actions have been childish than my original plan of maturity. I've only shown I can go off the deep end and freak out on someone in a phone store.” 

 

Everyone looked confused at that, oh shit yeah he hadn't told them all. 

 

While rubbing the back of his head, he pulled out his newly shattered phone and shrugged. “Happened this morning, so I was going to a phone store to fix it... “ 

 

Clint pointed his fork at Peter. “...Annnnnnd they said your coverage doesn't account for accidents? “ 

 

“Yes, well no that's not why I brought it up.”

 

“So, you freaked out on some person because your phone was trashed? Peter, come on I expected better out of you.” Didn't Peter already mention to Tony about his freakout on the lady in the store? He couldn't remember much of that last episode despite it really just happening.  

 

Even though that's not really what happened, the disappointment he heard in his father's voice was enough to hurt his confidence slightly. 

 

“No, I...look. I was waiting in line and there were these girls behind me. They just kept-ugh, kept nailing into this guy behind me with insults and it was getting to me. Like, there was nothing wrong with this dude, at all and they just kept laying into with these horrible words and I tried. I really did, and they called him absolute trash and I lost it. I went off on them, used stereotypes against them, even called the one a basic WHORE. Like I, ugh…!” He covered his face in his hands, embarrassed by his actions. The feeling of his aunt's gentle rubbing of his back helped him ease through the anxiety, however. 

 

What he didn't expect was the hushed laughter between Clint and Tony, who were quickly silenced by a kic under the table from Steve. 

 

Thor, despite listening the whole time, only had one question. “WHY WOULD ONE ASSUME A GIRL AT A PHONE STORE TO BE A COMMON WHORE? I BELIEVED THOSE TO BE RESERVED FOR PUB ASSOCIATIONS LIKE THE ONE I WAS TAKEN TO.” The god looked to Hawkeye for clarification and only got the response of the archer now laughing hysterically and slamming his head down onto the table to attempt to stifle it. 

 

The thunder god once again adopted a confused look. “I AM CONFUSED. WHAT IS SO FUNNY?”

 

Although Thor had been the one to speak, a lot of the room's attention was on the laughing Clint. 

 

Natasha growled, leaning over to table to the other assassin. “You took Thor...to a STRIP CLUB?” Peter jumped when the table shook from the smallest blonde pounding his fist on the table. 

 

“Yes!! Oh my god, yes I did! “ He sputtered out, refusing to stop laughing long enough to speak. “-But.. But i never imagined it would pay off so perfectly!!”

 

Peter scrunched up his face at his uncle. “What were you thinking?” He felt a sigh leave his lips. 

 

Clint wipes tears from his eyes, finally beginning to calm himself. “i was THINKING it might make for a good chuckle or two down the road, but i never would've believed-” the archer wheezed a bit, containing another laughing fit. “-I never believed this moment would be so PERFECT.”

 

“AM I NOT TO BELIEVE THAT THE STRIP GIRLS ARE NOT THE ONES YOUNG PETER FOUND IN THE PHONE STORE?” Thor looked between Clint and Peter, frowning when Clint started sputtering again, fighting his hardest to contain his laugh, especially once Natasha came over and grabbed the back of his neck. 

 

“This is about Peter, not about your dumb jokes. Stop laughing and pay attention.” She squeezed the archer’s skin on his neck making him cough and throw his hands up in surrender. “Thor..” She turned to him, who threw his hands up in surrender as well when his eyes met hers. “-we'll answer your questions after the discussion with Peter alright? Now's not the time.”

 

The god nodded, fiddling with his hands in slight embarrassment. 

 

Peter slunk further into his chair once everyone's eyes were back on him. “I...I'm sorry. I ended up being asked to leave the store. On the plus side the man I had stood up for knows a guy that can fix my phone, he texted me the details a while back, but I wanted a bit more info on him before I agreed.”

 

Tony hummed, taking a drink of his coffee and looked at Peter. “That person you were texting in the elevator?”

 

The brunette blushed and glared at the other. “It's not nice to eavesdrop like that.”

 

“Neither is calling someone a whore in a public store. Besides, you were pressed right against me, i looked over bam, there it was. “ The man grinned over at his son. “So, his name is Wade-” He shoved a piece of pancake into his mouth. “-you failed to mention that part.”

 

A chorus of “Wade?!” came from various members at the table. Thor furrowed his brows.

 

“WHO IS WADE?” He said, looking to Peter, who before he could open his mouth the other members of the avengers interrupted in unison again. 

 

“Deadpool.” 

 

Peter shook his head immediately, throwing his hands up. “No! No! Trust me, it isn't Deadpool-Wade. It's just another Wade. I know, I was a bit taken back too. But, he's just a dude, a cool dude I helped who wants to help fix my phone since I couldn't get it in the store.”

 

The billionaire scoffed, stabbing his fork into the stack of pancakes on his plate with an exaggerated pout. “I could get you a new phone, you know.”

 

“Nope. Not happening. I'll stick with my plan, thank you.” Peter smiled when his father rolled his eyes. 

 

Steve gave a smile back towards Peter and laid a hand on Tony’s shoulder to help soothe the annoyance. “Peter, while I'm proud you stood up for someone, this has been happening more and more. You've been going off the handle a lot. I think perhaps therapy or-”

 

“NO. No therapy.” Peter said with a sudden snarl, looking to his plate and playing with the pancakes. 

 

“Peter, I really think-” Steve tried once again but the brunette was having none of it. 

 

“I am NOT going through it again. Not again! I HATED it.” Peter's voice escalated a bit in his distress, the room's tension was so tight it felt like a rope tied around everyone's throat. Tears burned at the corners of his eyes, he slowly brought his shaking hands up to grip at his head. “Please...Please don't make me go back there, I couldn't take it, not again.” He whispered. 

 

Everyone's heart clenched at the broken sob that leaked at the end of his sentence. Yet, they felt powerless to stop the situation from getting worse. 

 

“Peter..” Natasha said slowly, smoothly to gain her nephew's attention. “No one is going to make you do anything.” She took a few steps closer, and when the stressed out super dis nothing, she leaned over and wrapped her arms around him. “We just want what's best for you.” She whispered into his ear, before giving him several kisses to his tangled hair. 

 

Steve walked over as well, getting onto his knees to look at his son better. “Yes, Peter, we'd never do something like that without your permission. What happened before that was...that was all the court system. They deemed it necessary “ the soldier rubbed soothing circles into the smaller back. “They're not here now. It's just us, your family.” He whispered, silently cheering once he saw Peter's beautiful tear stained eyes glance at him from between his hands. “We love you, we just want you to get better. “

 

The three other males sitting across the table looked to each other, taking in the scene happening in front of them. They silently agreed to remain silent for right now, knowing that Natasha and Steve were the right two to bring Peter out of his newest panic attack. 

 

“Your father is right, malen'kiy pauk. You have the power here. No court system can take you away and do what they did before. It's up to you now to decide what's best for yourself.” The redhead nearly purred, running her fingers through his hair, working out the tangles gently as she went.

 

A buzz came from Peter's pocket, Wade had responded to his text most likely. 

 

He hiccuped but calmed his breathing, finding comfort in the gentle scalp massage from his aunt and the feel of his pop’s strong hands rubbing his shoulder. “I...okay...okay I know. I'm okay..” He said with a shuddered sigh. “I'll get help. I promise.”

 

With a kiss on his forehead from Natasha, Peter sat up, letting her push his hair out of his face. “I'll do better from now on. I know I said it before but I see now how my behaviour is affecting everyone and-” He grit his teeth when tears threatened to fall once more, which Steve immediately wiped away. “-how much you've all been doing to help me. So I promise you...this will be the last time we'll have this conversation. I want help, I don't want to act like this anymore. I'll get better…” He nodded, now looking to everyone around him. 

 

“It's what May would've wanted.”

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Wade Fantasizes about Spiders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a brief look at Peter's file, Wade knew more about him than he had planned to. A fantasy later and they're having hotdogs at their hangout spot.

Ch.5

  
  
  


I don't  own these characters.

 

~~~~~~~

  
  


‘Weasel is a stupid name, trust me I know. Not sure if it's  real or not, but hey, the man's good with technology.  That means, sugarplum, that he can fix your phone lickitysplit. ;P ‘

 

The merc grinned down at his reply, scrolling through the brief  conversation he has had with the brunette.

 

((So...we're  going to get laid soon, right?? Right??))

 

{{If I had hands, I'd slap you.}}

 

((“If I had hands” Pssh. You know, it's weird that we can only hear the hot boy and the hot bod’s thoughts. ))

 

{{Oddly intelligent subject breech for you. But, yes. It's  quite odd. Seems way too convenient that someone like that would just wander into the same phone store. }}

 

((Let's  not forget he stood up for our ugly mug~♡ What a cutie!))

 

{{He's  clearly blind. Or an idiot.}}

 

Wade swatted at the air, as if clearing the thought bubbles and frowned. “He's  no idiot. Not Spidey, I mean have you  SEEN those web shooters? He made them himself you know, told me himself.”

 

{{We don't  know if he is actually Spider-Man, you realize. }}

 

((Who cares? He's  still a doll~♡))

 

{{Disgusting.}}

 

The merc chuckled, walking himself to his living room and flopping down on the couch all the while not looking up from his phone. 

 

{{You're  obsessed. More so than usual.}}

 

He scoffed. “I just potentially found out who spidey is on accident. On accident!! He totally can't  flac me for that! After All it’s not my fault I can read his mind but like NOBODY else's!” Wade slumped into the ratty couch with a sigh, rubbing at a certain spot of his hip.“-Learned that the hard way.” He gave a short whistle at the quickly  healing  HEEL wound.

 

((Wow, she kicked you HARD. Hehehehe))

 

“That she did, hurt like a motherfucker too.” Wade absentmindedly played a game on his phone while he waited on a reply from Peter or Weasel. 

 

{{Who would have imagined going up to someone and saying “Why can't  I read this slut’s mind” could ever have repercussions. }}

 

Wade rubbed the underside of his chin and hummed. “She was just sensitive. Spidey would have  laughed.”

 

{{-More like you were just INsensitive.  }}

 

He threw his hands up with a huff. “Oh come on! Are YOU guys gonna start giving me crap now? I'm  a mercenary, not a good guy, clearly.”  The man rolled his eyes and angrily searched through his phone. 

 

((I wouldn't  be so sure Spidey would like that, you know~))

 

With a grunt, the merc replied, “Why?”

 

{{Didn't  you see how shaken up he looked when he turned the corner?}}

 

((YEAH. He looked like he'd  seen a ghost! Who ya gonna call?))

 

Wade lifted a brow. “Shaken up? Could just be where he had to see my ugly mug and got scared  off. Wouldn't  be the first time that's  happened.”

 

{{He hasn't  seen our face. Only hands, and he seemed okay with those.  He seemed more concerned about our fashion choice.}}

 

“Seriously, you wear socks with sandals  ONE TIME and it's  all a guy can think about!! It was a moment of weakness!!! It was cold out and I couldn't  find my boots. Sad face.” Wade pretended to cry, perking up when the phone squeaked out a very dated voice clip of “WEB SWING.”

 

“Oooh! Petey messaged me!” He quickly went to the message. 

 

{{Like a damn school girl. Calm yourself. We don't  even know for sure if he is Spiderman. }}

 

((If he isn't  or if he is I don't  care I just want a piece of his lollipop~))

 

{{Oh GOD. We don't  even know his age yet, fool.}}

 

“He's twenty two.” The merc said suddenly serious.

 

((Wha?? How'd  you figure that out? Because Spidey is? ))

 

Wade opened the laptop on his table after clearing off clutter from the top and brought up a page from his history. “No, well yes and no. Look at this file. Peter Parker, twenty two years old, graduated from Midtown High, top of class, ooooh a science student. He's  5’ 6, about 170 pounds, brown hair, brown/ hazel eyes, and of course his sweet ass.”

 

{{It doesn't  say that last one on there.}}

 

The man giggled, scrolling down the page. “I know, I put that one on there. It's  like a wiki page, anyone can add shit to it. Ooh! Look he lives in an apartment  complex not too far from this one! Mhuahaha! The knowledge of the dark web.”

 

((What's  that thing at the bottom?? ))

 

{{Notes for his academic record. Some are at least six years old. Strange...look what they're saying.}}

 

Wade zoomed in to get a better look at the side notes on his record and whistled. “Looks like little scholar  here was playing  hookie A LOT. “ The man went to close out of the page after taking one last look.”Dammmmmn. Look at those unexcused absences. That's  pretty weird for someone like hi-”

 

((WAIT WAIT GO BACK!!))

 

{{There at the very bottom!}}

 

“-....Destruction of school property?! Baby boy what the hell were you doing in your teen years hah!” 

 

{{Keep reading, dumbass!!}}

 

Wade blinked, before glancing down at the page once more. “Destruction  of school property, most likely cause: backlash from the death of his parents (Richard and Mary Parker), uncle (Ben Parker), girlfriend (Gwen Stacey), and the newest at nineteen years old, his aunt (May Parker). Legal action is being taken for the boy's  safety and he is being rehabilitated in a controlled environment  complete with psychological therapy to help weed his obvious  depression.”

 

((HOOOOO SHIT. SPIDEY WAS IN A PSYCH WARD. I KNEW WE WERE SOULMATES. ))

 

{{It never said that. Controlled could mean anything. Perhaps a trusted family friend..}}

 

((-Orrrrrr you know. A psych ward.))

 

Wade stared at the page, feeling stupid for not having scrolled down and read through the whole thing. “I thought he looked to flowery  to say those things to that woman. I guess we aren't  so different after all…”

 

((You think Spidey  has voices in his head too?))

 

The scarred man chuckled, running a hand over his bald head. “He seems interesting enough. Kinda plain in the way he dresses but he's  got a sweet face. Such a sad backstory for such a young guy.  I feel kinda bad looking through his file like this, what would Spidey think of me if it was him and he found out?”

 

{{Simple. He doesn't think of you.  }}

 

((If it IS web’s file then we know A LOT about him now!♡ I say it's  worth it~))

 

Another chime followed by the ingenious sound of “WEB SWING” was heard from the phone on the table. 

 

Wade picked up his phone, chuckling at it once it was read. “He's  so damn snarky.”

 

“Listen, sugar tits. I don't  take kindly to pet names. Got it memorized, baby cakes?”

 

“But, Petey Pie, Baby Boy, my little brown bran muffin, how could you not like pet names :’C  They're  the best thing since the enchilada imo.”

 

“Guess I'm  just  not into enchiladas then lol”

 

“WHAT? Then what's  your favorite kind of Mexican  food??”

 

“I'm  more of a taco or burrito dude myself, man.”

 

“Plain Jane.”

 

“Asshole.”

 

Wade bursted out laughing, covering his mouth with the back of his hand as he responded from the brunette. 

 

((He's almost as snarky as we are!))

 

{{You're  right, he's  very playful. }}

 

The man grinned, locking his phone and setting it aside for the moment. “He certainly is. Not unlike spidey at all once we started hanging out more often. I mean, he still hates our guts but when we bring him food he seems pretty chill.”

 

With a grunt, Wade got off the couch and stretched. “What do you say to Mexican tomorrow night, boys? Petey Pie agreed to our little date~♡” 

 

{{He's  getting his phone fixed.}}

 

(( Plus Weasel is gonna be there. Total buzz kill. He never wants to do anything with us!))

 

“Yeah, what a cock block. I wish i knew how to fix baby boy's  phone. Then it really could've  been our first date.” Wade whined, leaning against the couch, looking at the crumb crusted covered carpet and whistled. 

 

{{What if he turns out to not be Spiderman? We'll  be dating just some random dude.}}

 

“So? It's  not like Petey isn't  nice to look at. He's a cutie AND he's  spunky. He also totally didn't  flinch away or even ask about my scars!” He shrugged with a grin. “What's  not to love about him?”

 

{{Perhaps the destruction of school property and the fact that he might be mentally unstable?}}

 

((…))

 

“...”

 

“BAH HA HA HA! ARE YOU FOR REAL? We'd  be such a hypocrite then!” Wade wiped a tear from under his eye. “Oh my lord. I never thought I'd  laugh so hard..”

 

((It just means Petey is probably our soulmate, there's  a bunch of stories like that. Kinda played out at this point though.))

 

The merc nodded agreeing to yellow. “Almost as bad as the Alpha and Omega stories. They are EVERYWHERE. Where's  the sexy merman stories?” He placed his hands on his hips and huffed. 

 

{{You are both insufferable. Absolutely horrible.}}

 

((Oooh! What about the actual spidey Pete ones… I love those!!))

 

*A result of Yellow and Wade’s imagination,much to White’s disgust *

 

A chitter sounded from the back of the thoroughly webbed apartment. It was the first thing Wade had noticed when he opened the door. 

 

The next thing Wade noticed was something landing on his shoulder. He totally didn't  flinch when he looked down to see a large tarantula gazing back up at him. 

 

“Henry! What are you doing out of your home? Did you do all of this shit? I was only gone two days!”  The mercenary gently picked up the spider and walked through the apartment. 

 

“Baby boy? Baby boy, where are you in this mess? You know I love some bondage play as much as the next guy but isn't  this a bit much?” He walked through the cluttered hall into their shared bedroom and struggled to open the door due to all of the webbing apparently holding it in place. 

 

Wade whined once the door remained shut. “Petey, come on! Are you in there? Is it locked? Come on, baby work with me!” 

 

A loud growl was he got as a response which made Wade’s spine tingle and Henry chittered in his hand. 

 

“Go away, Wade!” A weak strained voice called out from behind the door. “Just go away…”

 

Wade knocked on the door a few times. “Petey? Peter open the door.”

 

A moment of silence before a whine escaped the other man. “No! I'm  so ugly! You can't  see me..”

 

Wade reeled back as if he'd  been slapped. “Ugly?! YOU, baby boy you're  gorgeous! If anyone's  ugly you know it's  me. Besides…” He whispered through the door, lovingly. “I'd  love you no matter what you looked like..Please open the door for me.”

 

A meek chitter was heard from inside the room before the door creaked open and a set a black eyes with hints of brown peeked up at him. 

 

Wait, there were two more sets of eyes looking at him. 

 

“D...Do you mean what you said before, even though I  look..like this, now?” Peter opened the door,  allowing more light to filter through his form, outlining the brown fur. 

 

The added light allowed Wade to see just what it was that had upset him. Seemed Spidey had a second mutation and was self conscious of how he looked now. 

 

The merc knew that Tony Tin butt was already on the case for a cure and a way to temporarily hide Peter's appearance, so he didn't  have to worry about that right now, instead he looked to the spider in front of him and with a grin, held out his arms to his fuzzy love. “-of course! I love you, Petey- Pie! To the moon and back, you looking like this is nothing to me…” 

 

Peter's  eyes welled up and tears streamed down his furry face and he rushed forward and wrapped his arms around him, his multiple sets of arms. 

 

Okay, Wade was going  to have to get used to that one. 

 

The younger cried into his shoulder, holding onto him for dear life, and that kinda grip nearly broke Wade in half, but he endured for the sake of his lover. 

 

He ran soothing hands up and down the furry back, occasionally twirling his fingers in the fur, causing a strangled purr to come from Peter who, at the attention he was getting, was nearly asleep in his arms. 

 

“It's okay, baby. I love you, we'll  get you through this, okay? Everything will be okay, i promise.” He hummed, rocking the smaller back and forth before slipping his arms up underneath him and lifting him up off the ground and back onto the bed. 

 

He ran his hands through the brown hair and smiled at the peaceful expression Peter now made as his chest gently rose up and down as he slept. 

 

A chitter was heart at his shoulder. 

 

“I know Henry. He's  gonna need both of us to get through this. Can I count on you buddy?” Wade looked down to the tarantula comfortably situated on his shoulder and watched it jump and down with a purr, doing a small dance with its front legs sticking straight up. 

 

The mercenary laughed. “I have no idea what that means, but I'm  going to assume that means yes.” 

 

With a sigh, Wade carefully climbed into bed and sidled up behind his love and pulled him flush against him and laid his head down against Peter's. 

 

“I love you, baby boy.”

 

*End of their fantasies*

 

((Awwwww yeah. We should do that one next! WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR. WE HAVEN'T  SEEN PETER SINCE CHAPTER TWO.))

 

{{Drawn out character development is a bitch.  But the tags say “Slow Build” and “Eventual Romance.” Rome wasn't  built in a day. }}

 

Wade grumbled laying his head down on his pillow. “Why can't  it? Some fics people fuck immediately. “

 

{{Simple, he's  not a whore like us.}}

 

((AH WHAT. NO.))

 

“Hey! I'm  not offended but come on man, don't  judge  a man's  search history!” The scarred man waved a hand at the imaginary thought boxes and snuggled into the pizza smelling pillow. “Anyways. Night, losers. I'm  going to take a nap before catching Spidey on patrol. “

 

((Whatever!))

 

{{Like we care...}}

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

After his episode that morning, Peter spent majority of his day with the Avengers, basking in the love and familiarity it gave him, but he couldn't  help but drift his thoughts to Wade occasionally.  

 

No, not phone Wade. Deadpool Wade. His best fri-

 

Peter shook his head, currently in costume swinging through the streets. Best not to get distracted while swinging hundreds of feet above a busy new York street. 

 

After stopping a few low key crimes, New York City has been almost unreasonably quiet lately and when he had asked Tony, the man had simply said he'd  been doing a great job of picking up the baddies off the street. 

 

It had pissed  Peter off, he wasn't  five. He knew a quiet city meant trouble was brewing just around the corner. After all he hadn't  seen hide or tail of Otto or Sandman. Venom was hopefully still contained with S.H.I.E.L.D and not on the loose somewhere. Goblin was disposed of with Norman being dead and Harry in the psych ward for the time being. Shocker would be a likely candidate for an attack soon. He was the only one not locked up and the means of doing so. 

 

Peter grit his teeth under his mask as he webbed himself up to a familiar rooftop and laid himself on his back to stare at the sun setting on the horizon over the Hudson. 

 

New York was very beautiful when you weren't  down on the ground to hear all the shit going on down there.  Maybe  one day he'll  finally get Jonah to buy his landscape pictures. 

 

He placed his hands behind his head with a sigh. Today had been a mess, a roller coaster of emotions Peter wasn't  sure he'd  be able to handle again. It's  why he agreed to therapy at the end of his day with his family. 

 

He knew they were right, he needed help. To help try and get rid of these awful swings he's  been happy and maybe help him find a more creative outlet for his aggression. 

 

Maybe. 

 

To say Spiderman  was waiting on Wade, he'd  surely deny such a claim.  But, here he was, laying at their favorite roof, watching the sunset, wishing his best friend was here to keep him from getting lost in his thoughts with his constant blabber. 

 

Despite how annoying he was, Peter valued his company while he was behind his mask. He felt that no matter what he'd  say to Wade about himself, he'd  take it in stride and accept  him for it. 

 

The merc had flaws too after all. 

 

-And Peter accepted most of Wades flaws. The killing people for money, and unhinged insanity was a bit much to deal with sometimes, but they got through it. He's  saved Peter's  ass more times than he could count and he wasn't  about to seem ungrateful for it. 

 

Too lost in his thoughts, the hero didn't  notice Deadpool huffing his way to the top of the building and rolled up onto it panting. “At least take me out to dinner if we're  doing all this labor. My god…” Wade sat up noticing a tickling in his head as the boxes got quiet to listen with him. 

 

He looked over, seeing Spiderman lost in thought and the voice got louder. 

 

‘.....one day I can talk to him about this? No that's  stupid. Wade kills people for a living, what could he know about loss.’ The hero huffed, still not noticing Deadpool to his left as he looked to the darkening sky. 

 

‘He may know of the loneliness… I've  never seen him with anyone before. So, maybe he would know how this feels.  This emptinessssoOH SHIT.’ Spiderman suddenly lurched upwards and looked over at Wade finally.  “When did you get there!?!”

 

Wade through up his hands, mind reeling and boxes freaking over what he'd just heard. “Whoah there, baby boy! I didn't  do anything. I just got here. What's the matter with you?” He came over at sat beside the startled adult and grinned. 

 

“N- Nothing! You just surprised me is all..” The hero muttered, embarrassed and looking away when the mercenary started laughing. “What's  so funny?”

 

Wade was bent over, holding his stomach as he laughed. “I thought  you had a spider sense in that nogging of yours, Spidey! No one can ever surprise you!”

 

Peter blushed under his mask and turned away from the merc. “It doesn't  go off around people I don't  find a threat!! Ah..” His eyes go wide at what he'd  just said. “That doesn't  mean I like you or anything! I see your grin...Stop. stop grinning! “

 

Wade threw up his hand and smiled, lifting his mask up to his nose. “What if I bought a peace offering?” The mercenary did a tune as a bag came up from behind him. 

 

Hotdogs.Fuck yes. How on earth  did Wade always guess what he needed at that moment?

 

“Because I'm  awesome, baby! That's  why!” Wade opened the bag and allowed each of the to take their designated hot dogs and couldn't  help but stare when the spider themed hero raised his mask up over his nose and took a bite. 

 

‘If I budget right I should  be able to pay rent and phone this month at the expense of food for a while, maybe Doctor  Banner can help me with my chem report. Ooh, that was random thought. ‘

 

Wade continued to stare, listening to the thoughts of the other and just wondering how he grew to be so lucky. In all his times of blowing  his brains out he'd  never thought anything would come out of it other than the few minutes of silence from his boxes.    
  
"Spidey has anyone ever told you, you have a wonderful brain?" The merc said without thinking, batting his eyes at the other, not like Peter could see, but he was sure the other knew.    
  
"Excuse me?" Spider-Man turned to the mercenary,soon after stuffing a piece of his hotdog into his mouth.    
  
'What kind of weirdo is my best friend to say something like that?'   
  
Deadpool gasped, squealing  like a schoolgirl. "I KNEW you liked me!! I can't  believe you never told me I was your best friend!"   
  
Peter narrowed his eyes, chewing his hotdog. "I...didn't  say that out loud did I?" On the inside he was horrified he'd  accidentally let that slip. 

 

“No need to be scared, baby boy!  I'll  be the bestest best friend you've  ever had!” He clapped his hands and pulled Spidey to him.

 

The hero retaliated with a blush and a swift kick to Deadpool’s side. “Personal space! Gimme a break, Wade, I didn't  mean to say that.” He huffed, crossing his arms and gave a glare to the other. 

 

The merc only grinned and tilted his head at Peter.  “But, you still thought it! Trust me, I know what's  going on in that big brain of yours~”

 

“Pssh. Yeah right. Next you'll  be telling me you can read minds, Deadpool.” Spiderman grinned, taking a bite of his hotdog. 

 

‘Yes, I can. But you don't  know that.’

 

Wade laughed, taking  a bite of his own, talking with his mouth full. “Of course not! I'd  have to be some kind of nut then! “

 

Peter felt his eyes roll and a smile grace his lips. He swallowed. “You? A nut? Hardly.” The brunette  grinned, laughing once Wade looked at him with a fake hurt expression. 

 

“I'm  hurt, spidey! I thought what we had was special. Don't  tell me! You eat food with lots of people on this rooftop, don't you!” The scarred man fake gasped and covered his eyes. 

 

“I can't  believe you just called me a food whore.” The super laughed with the other as they now leaned against each other eating their food. “You're  the only person I do this with Wade. I don't  have anyone else really.”

 

‘I'm  alone most of the time anyway.’

 

Wade’s grin slipped off his face as he heard the other's  thought and looked down to see the sad smile Peter had on his face as he looked out at the Hudson, the first few glimpses of the stars visible as the sky darkened. 

 

The man had never seen someone look so beautiful and so tragic at the same time.  

 

His heart seemed to squeeze.


	6. Peter Is an Early Bird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and Wade have their dinner date, and Weasel fixes Peter's phone

Ch.6

I really appreciate all of the feedback I'm getting for this fic. Comments truly make my day. Thank you for the support!

I don't own these characters. 

~~~~~

Peter played with his hands under the restaurant table, taking in the simple Mexican theme of the restaurant Wade had picked out. He meekly wondered if showing up early to such a thing was stupid, considering the waiter had been by twice already to catch his order. 

With a small puff, he laid his head on the table and peered out the window at the busy streets of his city. Boredly, he played with a fork just as people came in. 

“-You're an idiot. An absolute travesty. What makes you think this was a good idea?! You barely know him!” A lanky man growled out, adjusting their glasses as they stood in line. He was talking to a hooded figure that made Peter's heart speed up slightly. Maybe?

“Aw shut it, Weasel. He's a nice kid. Besides. He needs his phone fixed and it's kinda my fault he couldn't do it. What's wrong with helping a guy out?” The taller chuckled, the sound ringing against the brunette’s eardrums as he quickly gathered up his straw wrapper and bunched it up. 

‘Okay, Parker. You can do this. Don't draw attention from anyone else and just throw it.’

As sly as Peter could possibly be, he chucked the straw wrapper and it bounced harmlessly off of Wade’s shoulder. The smaller would've thought his plan hadn't worked until he saw the man tense under his hoodie. 

“Weasel.” Wade said with ground teeth. “Who's the wise guy who threw shit at me?” He ignored the way his friend's eyes shown with amusement and tried not to pull his hands out of his pockets just yet. 

Weasel gave a smirk, sideling to Wade’s other side to look behind him and laughed. “I believe it's a small brunette who threw it. He's looking over here. “

As bad as he was at this sort of thing, Peter began making hand signals to Weasel, who still had not looked away from him. ‘Turn Wade around. Come here!’ He attempted to motion. When he saw Weasel smirk he assumed it went through. 

The lanky man pulled back from Wade’s side, adjusting his glasses. “He said to go to hell and don't worry about fixing his phone.”

Wade blinked, processing what his friend had just said before rolling his eyes. “Come on, Weasel. You're normally better than that.” The scarred man turned, catching Peter's eye and smiled under his hood. “Let's go over to the early bird now and do our business~”

Peter gave a small wave to the hooded man as he turned and motioned him over. 

Once they'd sat down, Wade practically smooshing Weasel against the window as he spread his legs, Peter laid his head on his hand and grinned. “I know this sucks, but I got here early and the waiter has already been by twice to get our orders, so I hope you know what you want. I've had almost an hour to think about what I want.”

Peter heard Weasel mutter something close to “love birds” but he couldn't be too sure because Wade was talking. 

Oh shit, Wade was talking. Pay attention!

Wade chuckled at the thought, waving a hand in front of Peter's face and grinned once he saw Peter jump and the blush that spread across the boy's face. Fuck he was adorable. 

The brunette bit his lip and sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck giving the man a smile. “Heh, sorry! I was zoning out a bit.”

The scarred man dramatically placed his head on his hand and batted his eyelashes at Peter, who rolled his eyes. “Do that often, love? You need to pay attention, a smart boy like you needs to keep a level head.”

“I believe I said something to you about pet names, didn't I sugar muffin? About how they're dumb and don't add anything to the conversation…” Peter smirked, leaning back onto the cushioned seat just as the waiter came by for the third time, eyeing Peter as he asked for their order. 

Wade slammed his hand onto the table, startling Weasel who was busy trying to be anywhere else but here. “I want some state of the art tacos, my man! And your finest refried beans. Ooh! And a beer too! What about you, Petey?”

The waiter, happy to finally receive some orders turned to the smaller and gave a strained smile. 

Peter shook his head. “Uhm the special with two chimichangas and rice please.” 

Wade struggled to contain his giddiness while the waiter wrote that and down and pointed his pen at Weasel.”And for you?” 

Weasel grumbled, waving a hand disinterestedly at the waiter. “Just a water please, lots of ice.”

As the waiter left, Wade grinned large at Peter, who merely lifted a brow. 

“So, Petey Petey BoBeety. You like chimichangas?” He twined his fingers together and gave a low chuckle. 

Peter shrugged. “Yeah, do you?” He took a sip of the drink he had already paid for. 

 

The man shook his head. “No, not really. They're okay. I just really love saying the word. Chim-EE-Chan-GAH!! See? It's fucking awesome. Like moist.”

Peter scrunched up his nose at the last part. “Moist is by far, one of the most disgusting words someone could ever say.” He gave a smile, twirling his straw in his drink with his nose still scrunched. 

“Moist Moist Moist Moist Moist Moist!” Wade grinned ear to ear at Peter's annoyed glare. “Moooooiiiiist!” 

“You are ridiculous. So, now that you know what makes me tick , gunna wind me up?” Peter teased just as a frustrated Weasel threw his hands up and groaned. 

“Good god! Did I come here to fix a damn phone or watch you two eye fuck each other? You,” He pointed to Peter and glared. “- gimme your phone if you want it fixed. I'll do it while you two eat. In the mean time, fuckin’ christ cut off the excessive flirting, will yah? Damn.”

Peter flushed, digging his phone out of his pocket and handing it to the annoyed man, who snatched it out of his hand and scowled at the screen. “We.. uh we weren't…-” 

“Kid, look. I'm an old man I KNOW what you were both doing. Calm your hormones a bit. Or, better yet go let out frustrations in the bathroom, I don't give a shit. But, I don't wanna look at it. Get it?”

Wade turned to his friend, laughing. “Jeez Weas, come on this isn't Margaret’s, he can't go wank one out in the bathroom.” 

Peter sputtered, looking at his lap, hands once again folded into each other. “I wasn't- ah.. I don't need to do that!!” He whispered at the end, embarrassed by the conversation on his behalf and bit his lip. “Can we change the subject, please?”

Weasel scoffed, having already taken apart Peter's phone, not looking up from it as he spoke. “Sure, hot rod.”

The scarred man in front of Peter laughed behind his hand and shook his head at his friend. “Petey, just calm down. He's just an ass, don't listen to him. Let's play twenty questions or something. To make conversation.”

Peter lifted a brow. “Why twenty questions?” 

“Ooh! Is that your first question? Okay, because i want to get to know you more. You seem like a pretty cool dude. I mean, anyone who sticks up for my ugly ass mug has to be.” Wade grinned. 

“Damn right.” Weasel scoffed, popping out Peter's broken screen. 

Peter seemed conflicted. “About that, Wade I'm not usually like that…”

“-Oh I know. I can tell you're just a baby boy.” Wade interrupted politely, waving his hand at the brunette’s nervous demeanor.

Peter blinked, surprised before he continued more confident than when he started. “Well...Uhm about two years ago, my aunt passed away. She was my only family left and the woman that raised me.” The smaller paused looking to The other who was now listening intently, not breaking eye contact with him. I've been having behavioral issues since. I guess I'm not good at coping, huh?” 

Wade hummed, giving Peter a gentle smile that made him blush. “Well Pete, I'm not gonna say sorry, because I know this type of thing and know you're sick of hearing that from everyone. But, I will say you're stronger than a lot of people. So what if you've got a smart mouth now? It matches your brain.”

Peter smiled shyly, looking down at his lap again. “My adoptive family think I need therapy. I told them I would try, though last time it didn't work out so well.”

“No, you don't need therapy.” The man said suddenly, making Peter look back up at him confused. 

“Huh? Why not?” 

Wade gently placed his hand on Peter's shoulder. “You don't need therapy, Pete. You need someone to talk to. But, by this conversation alone, I can tell you weren't comfortable talking to a therapist the first time, were yah?”

 

Peter looked to his lap again and quietly replied, almost whispering. “No.. but I didn't know what to do..”

“You just need a friend, Petey. I know you have some. Talk to them, talk to someone who will listen, bottling it up isn't helping and with time, maybe your “behaviour issues” will resolve themselves.” Wade removed his hand and Peter found himself missing the small comfort. 

The smaller rubbed at his arms looking to Wade. “You think so?”

“Yep. Know so. Trust me, Petey. It'll get better and so will you. Ooh! Our food is coming!” He clapped his hands happily as Weasel rolled his eyes, still tweaking with the phone. 

“Yeesh. Mood killer, kid. You both got serious so fast. “ He pushed up his glasses and gave the brunette a odd stare. 

Peter looked away, now not paying the man any attention as his food was placed in front of him and the other two received what they wanted. 

((YOU THINK IT'S HYPOCRITICAL THAT WE'RE TALKING TO PETE ABOUT SANITY WHEN WE HAVE NONE?))

{{100% Asshole level hypocrisy. }}

Wade’s happy smile twitched at the boxes’ remark, he wanted so badly to respond but no I not here in front of Pete right now. 

((MAYBE SPIDEY AND US CAN BE CRAZY TOGETHER))

{{ In your dreams.}}

“He's not...crazy.” He whispered, catching Peter's attention. 

“What'd ya say, Wade?” He asked after chewing his food. 

“Uh nothing. Hey! What happened to twenty questions? I'll start. Your favorite color Go!” Wade diverted the attention and gave a grin to the other. 

Peter hummed, knowing full well what he did, but played it off with a sly smile. “Red, yours?”

Wade took a bit of taco and spoke, mouth full of what was most likely processed meat. “I like red too, but I think I like brown.”

The brunette looked confused. “Brown, why brown?”

((BECAUSE IT'S THE COLOR OF YOUR EYES, GORGEOUS.))

{{For the love of god, please don't tell him that. }}

Wade mentally panicked. Shit shit shit. Why brown??!

{{Idiot. Why'd you even say it then?}}

((Say because it's the color of chocolate!))

Wade merely shrugged, chuckling at his own embarrassment. “Dunno. I just like it how it looks i guess. I especially like when people who have brown eyes like yo-uh when the lights reflect in them and you see specks of honey. My fave thing.”

{{JESUS CHRISTMAS. Could you be any more obvious.}}

((WOOOOO SPIDEYPOOL FLUFF FINALLY! IT ONLY TOOK SIX CHAPTERS.))

{{It'll take eighty to get to the damn sex scene.}}

Wade sputtered, the scars around his cheeks reddening making Peter smile. 

“Did your own explanation embarrass you, Wade? Hah, it was very sweet. I was kind of surprised by your answer.” He teased, taking a bite of his rice. 

The older man chuckled, sheepish about the boxes thoughts and being caught in his reaction to them. “Yeah, well haha. Okay I'll ask a question now. What do you look for first in a person, their looks I personality, etc.?”

Peter hunned, rubbing his chin, once again twirling the straw in his drink. “I think i look for a person's sense of humor. Because honey, if ya ain't funny ya ain't worth monayy, dig me?” He shrugged gauging Wade’s reaction. 

Said man was biting his lips to keep in his laughter from his response. “Hip talk is not a good look on you, Pete. Have you tried New York. You are from here, right?”

“Hey..it's my turn to ask a question, remember? Now, what do YOU look for in a person?” He batted his eyelashes at the other for affect. 

“Jesus Christ, it's like a damn teenage school romance sitcom. Fuck me, man. “ Weasel piped up from his side of the table. He looked to be just about done with fixing Peter's phone. 

Wade ignored his friend and immediately responded with a large smile. “I say same. If you're not funny, we most likely won't get along well.”

Peter tapped his fingers against the table. “Do you think I'm funny then? Because I happen to think you're pretty entertaining, yourself.”

“Baby boy, you're hilarious. I like your sense of humor a lot.” But Peter wasn't listening anymore when Wade had responded. He looked like he was staring into space.

((....WE BROKE HIM. ))

{{Throw him out. Get a new toy.}}

((NO. What's wrong??? :,( ))

Wade concentrated on Peter's face, tilting his head in confusion until the other's thoughts fumbled into his head. 

‘Baby boy.. That was weird has he called me that before? That for some reason they way he said it… reminded me of Deadpool… There's no way he is.’

“Peter. Come on, focus. Where'd you go? La la land?” Wade, trying to quickly snap Peter out of his thoughts before he had a breakthrough, damn he was smart, waved a hand into Peter's face once again and watched as the other finally looked at him with slight suspicion. 

{{...}}

((UH OH. SHIT SHIT. He KNOWS us! That HAS to be Spidey, there's no way it isn't!!))

Wade only grinned, hiding his inner panic as Peter raised a brow. “Did you call me Baby boy before? You just uhm.. well you reminded me of someone I know.. He calls me that.”

“I think I did in a text once. Not sure though. Gasp! Petey! Why didn't you tell me you already had a boo??” Wade dramatically draped himself against Weasel, who hissed and immediately shoved him off. 

Peter scrunched up his nose and shook his head. “He's not. Just a friend of mine that likes pet names like you do.” He rolled his eyes and took another bite of his food. “You're question, honey bear.” 

Wade only chuckled, sipping his beer when he got an idea. “You drink , Pete? You're above age right?” He looked up at him with a smile. 

The brunette only shrugged. “I'm twenty two, so yeah I CAN drink. But, I don't really. I can't afford to lots of the time and I really don't have the time to.” He looked out at the window, watching the cars pass and the people outside doing their own thing and a look in his eyes told Wade all he needed to know. “I just...don't really need to, i guess…” He had said softly, turning to look at Wade again with the smallest sad smile Wade had definitely seen before. 

Last night, on the rooftop he had seen it. That sad, lonely smile that made Wade just want to hug the smaller man and never let him go. 

For real, man. Wade knew he had problems, but damn if that didn't mean he wanted to see the most important person in his life suffer through the same shit he did. 

Peter/Spiderman was one of a kind, and now Wade knew that. He knew who Peter was and had met him randomly, and now with powers he didn't understand, he could communicate and find out what was going on in that brilliant brain of his. 

He didn't know if he had gotten these powers by chance or by some gift from a god of whatever. All Wade knew is that he wanted to know Spidey, to know Peter. 

-and he also knew he NEVER wants to see that smile on his face ever again. 

Yes, Wade decided right then, with Peter looking at him with his soft doe brown eyes, that he was going to love this man. Unconditionally so, and not just because of his major crush he had on his alter ego. 

After just one conversation with Peter, he knew he liked him. And now, seeing that damned sad smile on the hero's face and then once again at this dinner date, Wade NEVER wanted to see it again. Ever. 

{{What a croc of shit. Like he'd ever love us back anyway. }}

((Spidey said we were his friend! Without knowing he was actually speaking to us! That has to mean SOMETHING right?))

{{Whatever.}}

Wade stopped staring at the other man's face just as Weasel slammed his hands onto the table and nearly pushed Wade out of the booth. “Alright, I fixed the stupid phone. I've done my part now let me out of this hellhole!” He continued to push against Wade’s shoulder until the other man finally took the hint and slid out of the booth to let the man out. 

Weasel adjusted his glasses. “Fuckin finally. Anyway, consider your favor finished. See you around, meat face.” And with that, the lanky man left the restaurant with a grumble, even going as far as to flip them off when Peter had given him a small wave. 

Wade sidled back into his seat and gave Peter a smile. “That's fine that you don't drink, Petey. Smart, even. You're a good kid. You don't need that added baggage.”

The younger hummed, leaning against his hand. “Lord knows I have enough of that. Uh- I mean..” He stuttered, lightly panicked about what he'd just said. 

The merc shook his head, grinning. “It's cool, baby boy. I get yah, everyone has their problems. What's good is that you're being smart about dealing with them. AND as for your ‘behavioral issues’, if you talk to your friend about it, even if it's not the full story, you'll get better. You just need to vent enough to where it makes YOU feel better.”

“I already kind of do, if I'm honest. Speaking this little about it has helped ease me some.” Peter mumbled, picking at his food with his fork. Peter suddenly sat up, grinning as if having an epiphany. “You know what? You're absolutely right, Wade. I DO need to talk about it with someone. Someone who isn't a complete stranger and could understand…”

Wade grinned, “That's the idea! Good For you, Petey-pie! You'll get better in no time!” He gave a thumbs up and winked at the clearly excited other man across the table from him. 

{{ How utterly hypocritical. Pathetic really.}}

((You mean adorable and heart warming??))

{{Who are we to talk of therapy and sanity when we're insane? How could we possibly know what can fix Spidey?}}

((That's the whole point! We don't, but we're trying to let him know we care enough to offer!! See?? It's romantic!))

{{It's stupid and ridiculous. It will blow up in our face. Then he will hate us.}}

((It will WORK and he will love us!!))

Peter gave a smile and took a sip of his drink. When he looked at Wade time seemed to freeze, his eyes shone so much gratefulness that he couldn't help but give a smile back. 

“Now!” Wade clapped, rubbing his hands together. “How about we finish that game of twenty questions? We didn't get very far.”

Peter gave a nod, reaching over the table to pick up his newly fixed phone, smiling at the now smooth screen before the smile shifted over to Wade. 

“That's sounds nice, Wade.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also wanted to say sorry for the delay in this chapter, my grandmother passed away and it's been hard. But thank you everyone for the feedback, it really makes me smile.


	7. Rhino has a big HORN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade is excited to meetup with Spidey but somebody has to cockblock him. Someone who has a large horn.

CH.7

Thank you for all the kind words and comments. They really make me feel better, I get excited everytime I see one. :)

I don't own these characters

~~~~~

Wade Winston Wilson is now, without a shadow of a doubt, 100% sure that Peter Benjamin Parker is New York City's own Spiderman. Nerdy, small, ADORABLE, Peter Parker. 

Later that night, after the eventful morning, Spidey had texted him with his throw away phone stating he wanted to talk to him about something important. So, he was going to patrol earlier than usual. It was Spiderman’s way of telling Wade to be at the rooftop spot earlier than when they normally met up. -And Deadpool’s way of going from calm to losing his shit with nerves. 

Wade was ecstatic, completely bouncing off the damn walls at the anxious waiting to figure out what the web crawler wanted to tell him. He felt like he already knew but who know, he's been surprised by him before. It could be many things, an identity reveal, it was one of the tags after all, maybe a love confession, or maybe he was going to say something about their conversation this morning. 

((Tell us who you are, Petey! We already know but what the heck! Why not, kid’s a beauty.))

{{He won't. He's more than likely going to speak with us about his problems. We recommended that Peter should speak to a friend he trusted about it. Though, speaking with us is a no go. Kid's dumb for thinking otherwise, if you ask me.}}

Wade huffed, pulling himself over a roof’s edge before responding with a growl. “No one even asked you, White.” He panted,rolling over onto his back from the exertion and waited. 

((Yeah! What Dumbo said!))

The merc pouted, rubbing his hands against his masked ears. “Hey now. No need to get hurtful, my ears are average.” He rolled his eyes, deciding to crack his knuckles. “Besides, y'all heard him last night. He has no one else… Funny, neither do I.” Wade peeked over at the sunset sifting through New York’s many skyscrapers and gave a smile. “How nice, least we have something in common..”

{{Shoot me. If I am living in the shojo anime story, I at least want a blistering headache to block out the intense garbage.}}

((JUST BE HAPPY. We're FINALLY getting Spidey to open up to us! Aren't you excited??))

{{....Ecstatic.}}

The mercenary scooted himself to the edge of the building and decided to wait for the hero to show. He was a bit surprised to not find the wall crawler already sitting there waiting for him. 

((It IS weird that he wouldn't be here when he texted us to ‘Plz come a bit early.’ ))

“He's probably just nervous. I mean, he was so nervous at breakfast, and after a while he gained confidence. I'm certain he'll show up, albeit a bit late.” He let out a breath through his teeth and tried to tune out the boxes for a bit. 

This attempt was a good try, but as Wade found many a times, they never shut up for long. 

He had about a minute of silence before they began again, this time bickering about the possibility of Peter just deciding to ditch him. 

Wade groaned, running his hands down his face. He didn't want to think about that, not right now. He really LIKED Petey, he knew the brunette wouldn't leave him hanging. 

He also knew the brunette probably had a good reason for being late. 

{{I'm telling you he doesn't care. He's just making us out to be a fool. Like literally EVERYONE else.}}

((God, white. Shut yer pie hole. Petey is a sweetie, he'd never hurt is like that!))

{{So you keep saying.}}

The ground underneath the merc’s feet suddenly shifted, the buildings a ways away giving out a low groan at the strain.

Wade held up his hands and let out a loud whistle. “Attention, cadets! We have a lead! Look!!” And with that, he pointed a ways away where darkened smoke was rising from behind the city’s many skyscrapers. “Danger! DANGER WILL ROBINSON.” Deadpool quickly stood from the edge of the building and started digging through his many pouches, pulling out a variety of items such as a Hello Kitty chapstick, his fancy Adventure Time watch, and of course his fave spidey keychain. 

The merc grit his teeth, bouncing up and down. “Shit, shit, SHIT. Where is it?!”

((Why do we care about a fire? Ooh! Are you trying to find your phone to take a pic?))

{{It's not a fire. Didn't you feel the ground rumble? That...was an explosion.}}

((Who cares about the details, we LOVE explosions. Especially when we're the one who causes them!))

Wade pulled out his grapple hook and gave a shout of triumph. “Yes!! Now we're talkin’!” he quickly hooked the end to his belt and aimed for another building across the busy street below, where people were already causing a ruckus panicking about the explosion a few streets down. “Betcha $100 that's where Spidey is~” 

((MAKE IT $150 AND WE HAVE A DEAL.))

{{ You idiot. It's our money either way, we are in his brain.}}

((Shh! I rigged it, we'll be rich!))

{{...}}

The mercenary expertly began scaling the buildings, making his way steadily to the explosion that was sure to be preoccupying a certain spider themed superhero. 

~~~~~

There was smoke everywhere, in the air, in his eyes…

...in his lungs, but although it sucked and Peter kept coughing, he bit his lip and continued with his plan. 

Stop Rhino and that fucking bomb. 

He had already let off one, which led Spidey to this location, luckily no one was horribly hurt...or dead. And lucky for Rhino, because if he HAD, Peter would've beat his ass worse than he was now. 

With a careful flip, the hero had landed upright onto the brute’s back and gripped onto his horn. “Hey! Did yah escape from the zoo again? I keep telling them to put up better fences in your exhibit…” Peter gave a chuckle as the villain struggled in vain to get his off his large shoulders. 

“GET down from there, bug! One boom wasn't enough for yah??” The giant grumbled, voice dripping with a heavy Russian accent. He thrashed and shook his shoulders trying to dislodge the stubborn, sticky hero off of him. 

“Normally, I'm a guy who likes a little excitement but I think we may have different ideas of fun!” With skilled hands, the spider quickly webbed the larger man's eyes and flipped off of him at a safe distance and coughed when he breathed in more of the smoke. ‘Thank god most of the people on the street have fled already..’ He thought as he looked around. 

A roar of anger was heard in front of him as the Rhino struggled to remove the sticky webbing from his eyes. “I'm gonna CLOBBER yah, little man!! Just you wait!!” The massive man stomped his feet in frustration causing the concrete beneath him to crumble at the impact. 

-And also making Peter wished he had taken that aspirin before going to meet Wade. 

While dodging blind angry swings from Rhino, Spidey felt his mind dangerously begin to wander. 

‘Spending all day since that breakfast contemplating my thoughts on telling Deadpool about May? Bad idea, I knew no good would come out of it.’ A spark flicked the back of his neck, making Peter yelp and quickly duck, narrowly missing a punch to the head that definitely would've sent him flying had it actually hit. 

‘Thank god for Spidey Sense…Ugh, focus Peter. Hello? Big hunk of Rhino charging right at you!’

“YEEEEEEEEEEE-HAAA!!!” 

Spiderman and the villain both were shocked out of their fight and looked up to see none other than Deadpool swinging from his grappling hook off a gutter.

The brunette winced under his mask as the grapple unhooked and Deadpool plummeted and face planted the sidewalk with a grunt. Hissing through his teeth, the hero quickly made his way over to the fallen mercenary, ignoring the boisterous laugh coming from the supervillain, and shook him. 

“Wade, Wade come on, gimme a smoke bomb, or something!” He whispered, reaching down and digging through the man's pouches. 

“Keep fondling me like that, Spidey and you can have whatever you want~ My heart included!” The merc had finally lifted his head and his grin was visible through his mask. 

With a scowl, Peter reached in a pulled out three medium sized smoke bombs, and slipped two of them into a side pocket of his suit. ‘Gross, Wade. ‘ He thought as he pulled away, not helping the other up as Rhino turned his sights on him once more. 

“Man, webs, I thought what we had was special!” The mercenary whined as he popped joints back into place with a snap. 

Spider-Man rolled his eyes. “Shuddup, Deadpool. Got a lot on my plate right now, okay?” He Lowered himself into a better position just as the villain charged him. 

Thick russian laughter bellowed from the villain as he ran to the smaller, intending to nail him with his horn. “Yeh he does! Especially when he'll have my horn through him!” The man slammed his head around at the other, turning to slash at him with it. 

Popping his knee back in place with a crude snap, Wade jumped up and made a dramatic show of punching the man upside the head. 

-Which turned out to be a horrible idea as his hand shattered on impact, flopping uselessly to the side. “Motherfucker!!” He pulled away, holding his flailing limb. Deadpool continued to curse as he was kicked to the side, back towards the sidewalk by the young hero. 

“Wade, come on, his armor is bulletproof, you can't punch through that!” The smaller griped, letting out a huff as the villain stomped his foot, annoyed by the loud laughter coming from him. 

‘I HAD to jinx myself. I just HAD to say that the city was quiet and now I have to fuck around with African safari knockoff Rhino and Deadpool at the same time. Fuck my life right now.’ Peter thought just as Rhino went to charge once more and quickly threw down one of Wade’s smoke bombs and clouded the street in thick smoke.

Deadpool whined from somewhere to Peter's left just as the hero activated the night vision in his suit to help him see their outlines in the smoke. “Am i that annoying to you? I thought we were bonding??” The man whined making the super squint his eyes over at him, though it wasn't as if the other could see. 

The villain was blindly thrashing about, growling and yelling just like a wild animal and Peter had to dodge a few attacks before he flipped up onto the wall and looked for a possible defeat method. “Look if this is about the me kicking you thing, sorry but, a guy's gotta do what a guy's gotta do, you know? Besides, You're still human, Wade, you can punch through steel.” 

“Sure, that's what I was talking about. Totally!” The merc gave a laugh before he snapped his hand back to his arm. 

Spider-Man now ignored the mercenary in favor of looking around the environment, when the smoke began to fade, Peter noticed that the villain had knocked a fire hydrant off kilter. It certainly wasn't enough to break it open, but with enough force that could possibly be used to…

‘Hmm. Better be quick then.’

“Better be quick with what??” Deadpool shouted having no idea whether or not Peter was actually speaking aloud of not because the hero had just thrown another smoke bomb, much to the villain’s dismay and flipped to the other side of the street to the hydrant. 

‘Please work.’ He thought, grabbing the hydrant by the sides and pulling with all his might, hearing the strain of the metal underneath his fingers and the confused grunt of the villain hidden in the fog. 

“Huh?” The Russian started. “What-”

The larger never got to finish as a concentrated burst of ice cold water hit him directly in the face knocking him and his body armor into the building behind him. He shouted out, but as soon as his head collided with the building from the force of the water he was out. 

-Or maybe it was the shot of water to his only weak point. 

As the smoke cleared and Peter deactivated his night vision, he walked his way over to the villain and securely wrapped him in webbing and hung him up from the lamp post a ways away. With hands on his hips, Spidey turned and looked to his friend and shook his head at what he saw. 

“Are you seriously going to sit there sucking on your thumb because I kicked you? Come on, Wade.” Chuckling a bit, he walked over and hefted the man up out of fetal position and made him stand upright so he could pat him down and return his last smoke bomb. “Thanks for letting me use those by the way. Sorry about your hand, but you should be more careful next time. You can't hit him, what were you thinking, dork?”

God, Wade loved this man and his doting. He was hard on him, but he always knew the wall crawler cared. Why was this kid so sweet. 

“He was about to hit you, Pe- Pretty boy.” Wade prided himself in how quickly he had recovered from almost saying Peter's name. Lord only knows how that would've went down. 

The hero placed hands on his hips and tilted his head. “So? I'm a man, not like it hasn't happened before, I can take a punch.”

The merc pouted, pinching his hand to try and gain back feeling into the regenerating blood vessels. “Well… I didn't want you to.”

Spidey’s demeanor softened and he placed a comforting hand onto the taller’s shoulder. “Thank you. I definitely appreciate that. But, regardless of how fast you heal Wade, he can still cause a lot of damage to you a lot faster than he could me. I don't want you recklessly jumping in and getting yourself killed. “

Just as Wade was about to retaliate about how he COULDN'T be killed technically, Peter reached into a compartment of his suit and brought out his throw away phone and began calling the police. 

Granted, an ambulance or two had shown up, and police were on the streets further back with the distressed citizens, but Spidey was mainly calling to let them know it was safe and that he was done. 

((Whoa whoa whoa wait. Hold the phone. Did Spidey just say he didn't want us to get hurt? ))

{{Seems that way. What an idiot. }}

((OH MY GOD. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS, WHITE?!))

{{...What?}}

((It MEANS~ Spidey cares for us!!! Waaaay more than we thought! I mean he doesn't want us, US to get hurt. We have a healing factor that practically makes us immortal and he's worried about us getting a papercut. That. Is. SO. CUTE!!!))

{{Don't….Don't all superheroes worry about that? Hero complex and such? }}

((STOP TAKING AWAY THE BEAUTY OF THIS MOMENT, WHITE. SPIDEY LIKES US, REALLY LIKES US. ))

Wade just stared at the other while he called emergency services and casually walked among the rubble as he did so. He was awkward, just as Peter normally was when talking with him and paced about as he talked on the phone. The merc would bet he did it while texting too. 

-And the man's thoughts, PETER'S thoughts. How could he get over that? Was Peter going to talk about what was happening to him with him? Or was it something different? Maybe… Maybe he trusted him enough now to reveal his identity, though Wade had a feeling there was something major keeping the web slinger from doing so. A corrupted sense of responsibility, perhaps? Or maybe-

“-okay. Thank you, ma'am. “ Wade was pushed out of his own head, where the thought boxes were voicing their own opinions like spitfire back and forth, and looked at Spidey. He had just ended the phone call, hanging up and slipping his non trackable phone into his pocket. 

‘Time to do damage control with Wade, I guess.’

((Damage control? What's he mean?))

{{Oh boy, here we go.}}

“Look, Wade. Thanks for coming to help me, I appreciate it. “ The super had made his way over to the mercenary and was looking down at their feet, a rare show of submission from such a strong hero. “-And...I'm sorry for dragging you out earlier than usual with the texts. I had something I wanted to talk with you about but…” Peter looked over at Rhino, hanging limply upside down by his wedding and grabbing his horn, pulling him back to him with a scowl and letting him sway back and forth. 

“-it was my fault for even assuming that the city was becoming quiet. I had done it to myself, but I hadn't meant to drag you into it too, I know the whole ‘superhero thing’ isn't your cup of tea. “ The brunette sighed, folding his arms and finally looking up at Wade. 

‘Even though I wish it was.’

Wade held out his arms. “Wait, Wait! Why can't you tell me what you were going to say? Did I do something wrong?”

Spidey in response also held out his hands. “No!! No, of course not, you've been doing such a good job. I haven't heard anything about you killing anyone, so I'm actually PROUD of you, it's just…” With a sigh the younger shook his head and let out a frustrated groan. “I ..I CAN'T do this right now, okay? Look, just forget i said anything. I'm going to wait here until authorities arrive.”

“Are you going to keep arguing like little girl?” The gruff voice of the supposedly unconscious Rhino dulled out. 

Peter gave a grunt and whacked him in the chest, making a loud clang echoe in the vacated street. “Thought you were supposed to be passed out?” 

The villain growled struggling a bit in his binds, but made no progress other than swinging around. “I was. But, when i woke, I heard nothing but you and your lover's spat. “

Spider-Man grabbed him to keep from being hit by his swinging body. “Hey, I have an idea. Why don't I knock you out again so that way you don't have to worry about what I talk about when my villains are sleeping.” He patted the armored body before delivering a wicked punch to the open face, hearing a nice groan before the man went limp again and Peter cracked his knuckles. “Ah...MAN. I needed that!” 

When Peter looked up he noticed Wade staring at him. “Hey...Look, I'll tell you later, promise, okay?”

((That...was hot. He totally just knocked that guy out on the fly!))

{{He does it all the time!}}

((Yeah! But this time we got to watch!! Totally awesome!))

“No. It's not that, I know you'll tell me eventually, You're like that, just…” Wade consciously placed a hand on the other's shoulder just as the whir of sirens began to get closer to them. “If there's ever anything you need to talk about, anything to get off your chest you can tell me alright?”

The younger gave a laugh I, playfully shoving the hand off his shoulder. “Acting all mature now, huh Deadpool? Fine, I get you. I'll tell you soon, okay? Maybe another night. I gotta go now though, sorry again.” And with that, the hero shot a web up and was soaring through the air between skyscrapers until he was out of the mercenary’s sight. 

Getting out his grapple hook, wincing at the memory of face planting earlier, Wade hooked it to his belt and got to work getting away from the scene as well. 

Maybe now, after that conversation, things would be better between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say how amazed I am by the feedback of this fic. I've never had a story of mine liked this much by e and it makes me really happy knowing you guy's like it so much!!
> 
> Thank you so much everyone!!


	8. Things Get Real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade whines about Spidey's lack of attention towards him, but Peter has a solution for that, even if it is a little short notice.

Ch.8

I don't own these characters. MARVEL does.

~~~~~

Things were not better between them. If anything, since the fight with Rhino, it had been more closed off and awkward, like one of them had confessed their love only to have the other reject them. 

Unrelated that Wade did that all the time, but now it was like Spidey was avoiding him. He couldn't catch him on patrol, every time they went into battle, the younger would leave directly after and disappear from the merc’s sight. Wade couldn't understand what he'd done wrong. 

The tags said “Eventual Romance” for God's sakes!! Where's the romance??? All that's been happening is angst, fluff, and MORE angst! Wade understands character development, but goddamn. Let him have a moment soon otherwise his balls might burst as well as the readers. 

{{More like your brain. Small it may be, dangerous it will be.}}

Maybe if his head DID explode from lack of contact with his favorite hero, it would finally get rid of the damned boxes. 

{{Not likely, you've tried suicide many times. Including in the beginning of the fic. You literally blew your brains all over the wall, remember? Newsflash. We're still here.}}

((Ew, we looked like a busted cream puff. All gooey and pink and EVERYWHERE. Hehehe.))

{{Not all cream puffs are dyed pink, Yellow. Most are white. }}

((A VALENTINE'S DAY CREAM PUFF THEN. GOSH!!!...pain in my ghostly ass.))

Wade grimaced at the image of his innards being splattered all over one of the shitty brick walls in a crusty alleyway somewhere. “Gross is right. That chapter was posted months ago, I'm a new me! Plus, I don't really remember what happened that far back. Except getting these totally sweet mind reading powers honed in on my Petey-Pie!”

((Speaking of Petey~))

The mercenary was currently texting him, because while Spidey may have been avoiding Deadpool, Peter wasn't avoiding Wade. Though, his texts were short and to the point most times, the man was just happy he was getting some kind of response from the other. 

Over the past week since their breakfast date/phone fixer upper, Wade had learned a lot about Peter. It made it better that the information had actually come from him and not on an anonymous site somewhere like all his other info had. 

The game of twenty questions they'd played in the restaurant helped spark up more conversations and Wade was happy for the contact, even if Peter wasn't as flirty as he was before. 

During the game of twenty questions, Wade had learned:

That Peter's favorite color was red, his favorite eye color was blue despite having brown eyes himself (score one for Deadpool!) He was smart, like REALLY REALLY smart with both science and mathematics, that his favorite pastime was reading, and that he preferred older music to today's music, though the younger still seemed to adore a band called ‘Owl City’.

There were a lot more he'd learned, but most were flirty questions he'd been asked or asked himself. “What's your favorite position?”, “Do you like flavored condoms?”, and “If I was a lollipop, what flavor would it take for you to blow me?” Basic first date stuff, really. 

Of course, Peter had given him such a wicked smirk at the last one, took a sip of his drink and shook his head. “That question was too similar to the last one.” The brunette had then licked his lips, giving a pop when the action was done and smiled none too innocently at the mercenary. “Cherry.”

((Whoa ho ho! Seems Petey- pie isn't such a virgin after all! Who do you think his first was?))

{{Johnny Storm.}}

((Hah-What?! I can't tell if you're joking or being serious!!))

{{Sue me.}}

Wade’s fingers tapped away a quick response to Peter before giving a sigh and looking up to his stained ceiling. “That bozo has been in space for two years, how could he be Spidey’s first?”

{{They were close, probably still are, he was without a love interest for years, he probably needed some kind of sexual release…}}

((SO YOU THINK THEY...DID IT?))

“Like...did it, did it?? What a load of shit, I'm going to be his first. Here I'll ask him to clear it up.” Wade scrunched up his nose. 

((Ask him what? If we can have his virginity?? :D))

{{You've got to be kidding...Please tell me you're joking. }}

The mercenary rolled his eyes and typed out the inappropriate question with a winky face and locked his phone, setting it onto the counter. “No, I asked him if he'd had his cherry popped with a small joke about parfait.” 

((WHAT :D REALLY?! NO WAY!))

{{I can't believe I am apart of this only because I am in our brain. Disgusting. }}

A few seconds later a gunshot went off in his hand and Deadpool rolled up his mask and smiled at the text from “Baby Boy”. 

((What's it say, what's it say?!))

{{You idiot, you're in our head, just read it, dumbass.}}

((But, I'm leaving suspense for the readers! GASP. Did Spidey, in fact have his cherry popped? If it was a tootsie pop how many licks would it take to the rich, orgasmic center?))

{{...}}

Letting out a small huff, Wade locked his phone and shoved it into his suit pocket. “He avoided the question, in case you're wondering. He sent a meme instead, I believe that means we're soulmates.” With a sigh, he laid his head on the back of the couch and stared at his stained ceiling. “Plus we TOTALLY have a date later tonight, according to Petey.”

There was stunned silence for about a second before yellow’s loud screech echoed in the merc’s head. 

((OH MY GODDDDDDDD. THIS IS GREAT, OMGOMGOMGOMG. PETEY IS COMING HERE TO OUR APARTMENT TONIGHT! ?!?))

{{He never said anything about our apartment.}}

((I COULDN'T HOLD BACK TO MAKE ANY SUSPENSE ON WHERE IT WAS HAPPENING. ))

“Guys, Guys. Chillax, okay? It's gonna be great. Petey will LOVE IT here.” Just as this was said, a slap was heard and a moldy piece of pizza from God knows how long ago, fell from the ceiling with a splat onto Wade’s coffee table, knocking over a few ramen noodle cups with it. 

((...))

{{...}}

“...”

{{How long until the date?}}

Wade looked at his trusty cracked Adventure Time watch and whistled. “-Bout two hours, give or take.”

{{Mhm.}}

The man suddenly sprang up off the couch. Scooping shit off the table and floor until his arms held nothing but bundles of old garbage that wreaked so bad it burned his nose hairs. 

He scooped the food and dirty clothes around the couch and used his broom to skid stuff off the ceiling into his arms. After having filled his trash can to the brim, Wade began shoving the excess garbage into one of his side closets, grunting as various guns and swords fell out once he opened the door. 

((How are we not evicted yet? :0 ))

{{By the grace of the author's interpretation of our landlord and because no comic writer cares enough to put in small details like that.}}

“New headline comic! Famed Merc with a Mouth, Deadpool loses his spot as a Marvel icon from the 80’s due to him being a disgusting slob and losing his shitty apartment.” Wade quoted as he viscously scrubbed away at something on his coffee table. After a few moments of nothing but the sound of the washcloth harshly running against his table, Deadpool laughed. “Nah! They can't afford to lose me now that the tweens and twinks have grabbed ahold of me. I'm a pop culture icon now! It's practically impossible to go into a Spencer's or Hot Topic without seeing my face plastered on a taco or unicorn. “

{{Distasteful, and not at all what we stand for.}}

Wade scoffed, throwing the rag into the kitchen from his spot by the couch. “Hey, man. If parents WANT their six year old kid to wear a mercenary’s hehe MERCH, then be my guest. Not my fault nobody really knows the shit do.”

{{Those that do think we're hip and cool.}}

((-But we ARE cool!! We have our own underwear!))

{{Not exactly the bar I was hoping for.}}

“A bar all the same, white. Teens love us, kid adults love us, and the kiddies of course love us! We're staying as long as the trend sticks!” Deadpool was wiping off his kitchen counter with a weirdly stained rag while whistling an Evanescence song, one he knew Petey probably heard in his kiddy days. 2003 was a weird time. 

{{So in about six years we'll be obsolete again?}}

((Maybe, but the spideypool comic still exists! THOSE FANS WOULD NEVER LET THEIR DREAMS DIE. WHOOO BABY!!))

“OTP. OTP. OTP!!” Wade cheerfully shouted as he paraded around in his apartment in Spiderman boxer shorts, picking up things here and there as he went. “Yellow’s right, White. We need to wait for the comic to die too. Which, with the rising popularity since around 2012, ain't gonna happen anytime soon, babes. Webs is gonna be our little eye candy for a while.”

{{I hope you're not referring to this Spidey, cause that's low even for us.}}

Wade waved his hand, slipping on some semi clean jeans. “Bah! Of course not, this 100% isn't Earth 616 Spiderman/Peter Parker. This is an alternate universe, one where Stan Lee isn't adamant about him being straight as an arrow because he's still in the sixties. THIS universe features an insecure and angst ridden Spidey-”

((-what's new about that?!))

“- a handsome, adorable mercenary that's yours truly-”

{{Pretty sure you have to at least look like something other than an exploded hot pocket to qualify as handsome… }}

“-AND an eventual romance tag courtesy of a fanfiction writer obsessed with fictional characters and diverse personality relationships. Hell, this is the same person who ships Bill Cipher and an older Dipper Pines. “ The merc with a mouth laughed, throwing his hands behind his head and grinned. “ I mean COME ON, they totally wouldn't go for each other.”

((Didn't he kill everybody in the end?))

Wade picked up an old baloney sandwich from inside his old vcr and whistled disapprovingly to the air where the yellow speech bubble popped up. “SPOILERS, yellow. What of the readers watching? He didn't though, no.”

{{Pretty sure they're reading, and more than likely don't ship the same thing AND are here for spideypool.}}

((Yeah, but seriously it's taking FOREVER we're gonna have pink balls by the time this is over!!))

{{Pink? Don't you mean blue?}}

((NO. PINK. IT'S SO LONG, IT SKIPS OVER VIOLET AND BLUE!))

{{That's not how it works you fucking dumbass. }}

“Hey, Hey guys don't fight! I need some help! Look at my outfit whaddaya think?” The merc held out his arms and showed himself masked in the mirror with a tighter hoodie and a nice pair of fitting jeans. 

{{Aren't you a bit underdressed?}} 

Wade rolled his eyes and tsked. “He's coming over to my house, not to Denny’s. And my house isn't even fit FOR clothes, if I could, it'd be a strictly no clothes zone!” 

((You should totally tell him that when he comes in!))

{{Oh, yes, because that would go over so well.}}

Wade stomped the trash further into the trash bag to be taken out while spraying a shitton of fabreeze into the air and huffed. “Is that sass i hear, white? I don't need that right now. I WANT some Spidey behind.”

((Petey wouldn't put out on the first date!! Or maybe he will, which would be awesome.))

{{It's technically the second date, you know.}}

((Details, details!))

“I don't really count a date as me, the significant other sandwiched between my ass of a friend Weasel getting their phone fixed, white.” Wade tied up the bag, wrinkling his nose at the stench, and headed for the door out of his apartment. 

{{- and one in your shitty apartment IS? Amazing.}}

Wade opened the door, turned to look up at the ceiling where the invisible boxes were. “Hey, I said watch the sass! I'm already nerv-” When the merc had turned around he dropped the garbage bag in his hand onto the floor once again and it made a rather loud thud on the wooden floor. 

There, standing at Wade’s now open apartment door was Peter. 

Who, admittedly looked adorably flustered and embarrassed at being caught standing next to the door, too nervous to knock. 

The brunette bit at his lip, making Wade’s stomach clench, and let out a small laugh. “H-Hey, Wade. Don't think that I've been here a while, cause i haven't! I just…” He looked down at his shoes and rubbed his sleeved arm. “-little too nervous to knock on the door.”

((OH SHIT BOI, IT'S PETEY!!))

{{-plus he's early. Way early.}}

“-You're early…” Wade found himself muttering without thinking, making both him and Peter wince. He held out his hands in defense. “Not that it's a bad thing!! Just making an observation! You like being an early birdie, Petey? Early birds get the worm, you know, haha..” The merc wanted to slap himself for rambling. 

Peter turned a nice shade of red from the comment and nodded his head, looking up at the older. “Yeah, I am. I'm sorry! I know we said six, but I was in the neighborhood and well I was bored, actually. I hoped you wouldn't mind…” He trailed off, looking to Wade with a pleading expression. 

((Hah! Neighborhood!! Like friendly neighborhood Spiderman?!? Haha!))

{{You're trash.}}

The merc’s brain nearly short circuited at the look before he nodded slowly, ignoring the boxes comments on what Peter was most likely doing before he came by. “y-Yeah. Course, come on in, don't mind the mess…” Wade stepped aside to let the smaller man through, watching him go in and begin looking around the apartment curiously. “The maid hasn't been in recently.” He closed the door, leaving the trash out in the hallway. “-and by recently i mean never. “

Wade heard Peter laugh and gave himself a mental high five. 

((Yessss. YESSSSSSS!!))

{{Shh! Quiet! }}

“Hah, you're so goofy, Wade.” The younger had said with a smile, melting Wade’s heart at the sight. 

The merc puffed up and the compliment and grinned through his masked face at te other. 

((Wait…))

{{Mask?}}

((OH SHIT THE MASK, YOU STILL HAVE THE MASK ON AROUND PETEY. HE KNOWS YOU'RE DEADPOOL NOW OMGGGGG))

{{ He didn't react to it at all, we had completely forgotten about it being on…}}

((Now what?!!))

{{Act natural and whatever you do, don't being it up. }}

“You haven't said anything about the mask…” Wade muttered, without thinking once again causing shouts of protests from the boxes in his head. But, he ignored them in favor of taking in the face of the other looking at him with such soft brown eyes. 

Peter mouthed “Oh,” and looked off the side seemingly looking for an excuse and walked a bit closer to Wade so he really had to look up to look into the eyes of the mask. “Well, i really didn't think anything of it, I could tell from breakfast the other day that your were sensitive about the way people look at your skin. I thought maybe i had...looked at your wrong or offended you the other day to make you uncomfortable to show yourself to me again. “ He bit his lip, looking off to the side and avoiding Wade’s eyes under the mask. 

{{Like he really cares. }}

((Shh! It's a moment!))

“i just… want you to know that if i did ANYTHING to offend you since we've known each other, that i didn't mean it. I was raised to look at person not to LOOK at a person, if you catch my drift…?” The smaller looked up, hopeful and adorably biting his lip. 

((What's that mean??))

The merc scrunched up his face, nearly astonished at the words coming from Peter, but still had a bit of confusion. “Whatcha talking about, Pete?”

The other blushed, rubbing the back of his head, absentmindedly running his fingers through his hair as he did. “Well, I mean like to really look at a person for who they are, not for what they look like. It's just not that important to me. I was raised to love the person not the vanity, you know?” 

((HOLY SHIT. He is the sweetest smol babe ever.))

{{When in any universe would this happen again?? To US of all people?}}

Meanwhile, Wade stood there, still as a statue, looking wide eyed at the small male looking up at him expectantly. “You… uh..” Wade tried to make words form but all that would come out was garbled noises making Peter scrunch his cute little face up in confusion.

“Wade? Are you okay? I can go if you-” 

“No!” The merc had grabbed Peter's arm when he reached out to the doorknob. “No..i… I'm fine, just surprised, that wasn't exactly what i expected to hear from you. Not at all, and not from anyone really.”

He let go of the arm, watching Peter turn to him and give him a small smile. 

“Do you REALLY think that way? That my skin doesn't bother you at all?” Wade nearly pleaded, ignoring the way the boxes were losing their shit and stared into Peter's beautiful honey orbs. 

Peter looked down at the hand clenched tightly at Wade’s side and reached out and gently grabbed the larger hand within his and smiled up at him. “Nope. All I see is you, Wade. Not your skin, just you.” He ran a calloused thumb over the top of the merc’s hand. 

With his free hand, Peter reached up, tentatively running his nimble fingers around Wade’s neck to the base of the mask and looked at other for permission as he hooked his fingers underneath the fabric. 

At a hesitant nod from the larger, Peter beamed at him, slowly lifting the mask while his other hand held firmly to Wade’s shaking hand. The fabric moved up, smoothly over the mercenary’s face until it came up over the top of his head and laid limply in Peter's fingers. 

A second passes, the two of them just simply staring at the other in a new light than before. Wade had never met anyone so beautiful inside and out, and Peter, well Peter had never met someone so strong. 

Letting the mask fall to the floor, the brunette placed a hand on Wade’s cheek, the silence seeming deafening to the two of them as they continued to lock orbs, never once stopped looking at one another, even as the younger released Wade’s hand and placed it gently on the merc’s shoulder. 

Wade felt Peter run his fingers over his rough lips and muttered against them, unbelieving this was actually happening and wasn't just some fucked up dream. “You don't think...I'm ugly?”

Peter's thumb rubbed at his lips and a smile too knowing for someone so young crossed his face as he leaned closer, eyes slipping shut. 

Now, normally, Peter Parker was a nerd, a shy one at that. He'll admit that he MAY have been a bit caught up in the moment to fully comprehend that the man was indeed Deadpool, but it wasn't as if the man really kept his identity a secret in the field, so Peter had suspicions. This was just icing on the cake. 

No, what Peter was thinking about now, was how badly he wanted to kiss the man in front of him, and he really couldn't put a finger as to why. Perhaps it was how nice and sweet Wade was, and how funny and there for him Deadpool had always been. 

The hero didn't care, and he was sure the other didn't either as Wade’s eyes fluttered shut as their lips connected and time seemed to stop.


	9. I'll  See You in My Dreams, Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade and Peter have their date after a small heart to heart and Wade discovers more about his new power.

WPW ch. 9

I don't own these characters, only the story. 

~~~~

 

The feeling of Peter's lips on his own, so soft compared to his rough ones, was amazing and JUST what Wade needed to calm himself back down from his mild panic attack. 

((OH MY GODDDDD. OH MY GOD!!!! Holy shit, Petey is KISSING us!! ))

Wade blinked his eyes open and looked at the smaller in his arms. 

Peter had his eyes closed, an adorable flush to his cheeks, and light freckles on his nose now that the merc got a closer look at him.

A hand trailed up the back of his neck and laid to rest on the back of his head. 

((IS THIS HEAVEN. I JUST WANNA KNOW IF IT'S OKAY TO SAY ‘LET'S FUCK’ OR NOT.))

{{Leave it to you to think with our penis. Also, weren't you the one saying that he wouldn't put out on the first date? }}

((Listen, we have a hot piece of spidey ass that totally just made a move on us and you want me to think with our head?? Hah, which one, white buddy?))

Wade tuned them out, momentarily forgetting about them as he was finally able to focus through all the stress and hear Peter's thoughts. 

‘-god oh god, i hope he doesn't think I'm weird for doing this!! Maybe i should just pull away? Yeah, sounds good then i can just leave-’ 

The merc had only heard the tail end of the brunette’s thoughts but felt his heart skip a beat and quickly wrapped an arm around the small of Peter's back. He wasn't getting away from Wade anytime soon, especially not now, not after he knows that he's Spiderman, and he's nearly 100% sure Peter knows he's Deadpool. 

-And yet here they are KISSING in Wade’s shitty, rundown apartment like their lives depended on it. 

Yes, hell YES. He was kissing SPIDERMAN. AKA, the best booty to grace this earth since Babe Ruth. The baseball player, not the candy bar. This was every fantasy, dream, etc Wade had ever had and then some. Nothing could compare to the real thing standing in front of him, the other who was currently losing his mind. 

Against flushed lips, Peter tried pulling away, getting out a simple “Wade, I can't-” before he was lulled right back into another kiss with the merc, effectively melting into it once more. 

‘I can't, i can't i can't-’

((Why is Petey thinking like that while kissing us?))

{{Well, maybe if we'd had let him finish speaking, we’d know. }}

When large scar hands sensually trailed down the smaller back and cupped Peter's part bottom was when the younger jumped up and out of the kiss, placing hands onto Ward’s chest to keep him at bay. “Wade, no, I can't- We should stop.”

Wade made a strangled sound in the back of his throat when Peter pulled away and gave a whine. “Why, Petey? We mash so well together! Like Oreos and freshly brushed teeth!” 

Peter scrunched his nose up in disgust, before smiling. “Gross. But, I don't mean the whole “Let's try dating thing”, I meant the sex part.” He shuffled a bit on his feet, looking down at the hands he had curled against the other's chest. “I'm just not ready for that kind of intimacy right now, if it's okay. I just...have a few things I need to deal with, you know?” The brunette whispered, looking up at the other and nibbling on his lower lip. “Please?”

((God, how could we say no to such a beautiful boy?))

Wade ran his hand down the other's face, letting his touch fingers memorize the smooth feeling of the other's cheek before smiling. “Of course Petey Pie. I never expected it out of you, the sex would be phenomenal but only when you're ready. I can wait, baby boy.”

The merc took a second of silence to relish in Peter's smile and finally processed what was said. “Wait, so you know I'm Deadpool and you're okay with dating?”

The other shrugged, you haven't seemed like you've been killing much recently. And I had a hunch from the mask that either A-you were Deadpool. Or B-you were a fanny.” He grinned up at Wade, pushing himself a few steps away by a hand on Wade’s chest. 

Wade smirked down at the shorter man, the grin making him want to kiss the him once more. So snarky. “Oh? What does being a fan have to do with it? Can't I be a fan of myself?”

Peter looked around the bulkier form of the mercenary and lifted a brow at the famed Deadpool mercy scattered around the living room alone, even narrowing his eyes once he spotted a plush of the merc with a mouth pressed up against a similar spiderman plush. 

“Hmm...no. But, you certainly could do without the fanservice posters and mask printed condoms.” To prove a point, Peter flicked Wade’s belt, which just so happened to have his mask printed onto it. “Honestly, you don't make the whole secret identity thing that hard to figure out and though I didn't know before I came in here, I certainly do now.” He laughed, smiling up at Wade’s half smirk. 

The taller folded his arms over his chest and turned his head with a huff at the smirk..”You don't know! I could just be a huuuuuuuge ginormous fan of Deadpool. Because let's face it, he's the sexiest out of Marvel's hot bods and Team Red.”

Laying his head against Wade’s chest, Peter sighed, his fingers absentmindedly feeling the curve of Deadpool’s pec, now that he didn't have anything to hide emotionally.

He still had a LOT to hide physically and psychologically, after all.

“I'm more of a DareDevil man myself, Wade, hate to break it to you.” He chuckled, squeezing his arms gently around the merc, relishing in the fact that the other felt strong and sturdy in his arms. The slight comfort made Peter feel like he could talk with the merc about anything. Which Peter knew he could, he had known the man for years now as Spiderman.

But, there was always a certain feeling of anonymity between their meetups, the masks helped, of course. Peter would watch what he'd say around Wade, knowing that one mistake could put his identity in danger of exposure. He knew the mercenary would never intentionally eat out his identity, but he knows Wade’s mouth, DEADPOOL’S mouth and he knows how he can get when he's just woken up from a...uhm ‘dirt nap.’ 

Still, he trusted Wade. It was that trust that made Peter not let go and leave this relationship where it was forever, delete the man's number from his phone, block him, etc. Trust was the one thing the hero had to hold onto and Wade was the one who held the most right now in the palm of his hand. 

\- and that thought alone made Peter TERRIFIED.

‘What if I've made a mistake in coming here? This could end very very badly, though it's not like I have anyone to protect anymore with hiding who I am. Maybe I should tell him? He deserves to know, I mean I know he's Deadpool, it's only right that he knows I'm Spiderman.’

{{Confirmation alert.}}

((HE ACTUALLY ADMITTED IT. NOW WE KNOW WITHOUT A DOUBT HE'S OUR BUBBLY BUTT SPIDER!))

{{We knew this already. Still, him.admitting it solidified it. }}

“Peter Parker is Spiderman…” The merc found himself muttering without thinking in response to the thought boxes. 

The reaction was immediate, Peter jumped from Wade’s arms with a yelp as if he'd been burned and nervously wrung his hands together. “W-What?! Wade-” He ran a distressed hand through his hair, early panicking, it was almost as if Wade could read his mind! “Wade, what are you talking about??”

Quickly backtracking, the taller held out scarred hands in surrender and took a nervous step back, knowing that when Spiderman got nervous around him, he tended to kick at him. His kicks HURT, healing factor be damned. “I MEAN UH. You REMIND me of Spidey! N-Not that you ARE Spiderman!” He waved his hand rapidly when he saw the smaller's face go from panicked to confused and very quickly to irritation. 

“Wade, WHAT? How?” Peter placed his hands on his hips, pouting up at Wade. ‘Jeez, he nearly gave me a heart attack!’

“You and me both, baby boy.” The merc said automatically, wincing once Peter's face became confused once again. “Okay, look. I meant that you remind me of him, because...well, you know I spend a lot of time around him and everything, right?” 

The hero crossed his arms, narrowing his eyes. “Right.” When he gave no more as a response, Wade continued his half assed attempt at a cover up. 

“Well...your personalities, they kinda are alike, like a lot. You space out a lot-”

“-So do you, Wade.” Peter noted dryly, a slight hint of a smile on his face. 

The scarred man shook his head with a chuckle, “Besides the point, Petey Pie~” He cleared his throat obnoxiously, earning a small grin from the other. “As I was saying, you both space out a lot, go toe to toe with me on clever quips and comebacks, AND you both have a killer booty that could make grown men cry.”

Peter flushed at the insinuation about his behind and glared up at the other playfully. “What is it with you and butts?”

The merc placed a warm hand onto Peter's shoulder a squeezed. “Pete, Pete, Petey…” He wrapped the arm around the smaller neck and pulled him back against him. “Have you ever SEEN your sweet cheeks of glory?”

The hero gave a startled laugh and slapped the taller’s arm. “Sweet cheeks of glory? Now, I know you're delusional!” 

Wade grinned, placing a hand under the other's jaw and tracing it with a rough finger. “How can I be, when your pretty bambi eyes bring me back everytime?”

“Flattery will get you NOWHERE, Mr. Pool.” Peter said just after nipping at one of the larger fingers near his mouth.

The mercenary felt his brain short circuit for a moment as he processed that action. 

((Oooooh. I LIKE that name! Mr. Pool...hehe))

{{Focus, idiot, he's looking at you!}}

((We can masturbate to this later!!))

Wade snapped out of his thoughts once again at the inner ramblings of Peter, who despite staring at him with wavering honey eyes, was absolutely losing his mind on the inside from his previous move. 

‘-why the fuck did I do that, oh my god I'm so embarrassed. I say I don't want intimacy right now and then I go and do a thing like that?! Jesus, Peter calm your hormones fuck, what am I, 15?’ 

Wade threw his head back and laughed, eventually covering a part of his face with his hand. “Ohhh my god, baby boy, you're perfect.”

There's when the blush settled on the young hero's face. “What? What's so funny?” He whined, embarrassed. 

“ ‘Mr. Pool’? Really? That was a good one, it took me a minute to get it. You really are something you know that?” Wade kept the hand against Peter's cheek and smiled down at him, rubbing the smooth skin with his own rough thumb. 

Peter, averted his eyes, finding something rather interesting with his hands and nervously moved them around. “You are too, you know. I really..uhm…” He bit at his lip, nibbling on it before sighing and letting out a groan. “Nevermind, I've expressed too many emotions tonight, I'm tapping out. Can we just...go watch some TV? Or something, I don't really mind what…”

“Of course, Petey. Golden girls it is!”

 

~~~~~~~~~~

And that was how, three hours later, Wade found himself rambling on about the differences in his favorite show as the seasons went by, the inevitable death of Bea Arthur and how he named his two favorite swords after her in memory. It was also how he looked over and saw Peter curled up against him on the ratty couch, completely asleep, contently nuzzled against the merc’s chest. 

((So Peter Parker is Spiderman confirmed))

“Always knew he'd be a looker, I mean even if he wasn't, I can't exactly complain about that myself.” Wade ran his fingers through the soft curls of Peter's hair, carefully whispering responses to the boxes so as to not wake him up. 

{{What a wonder it is he even gives a shit about our ugly ass anyway. }}

((Youuuuu heard him. He said he wasn't raised on vanity. So he doesn't care about the way we look!))

{{A likely story. It's not like he'd say it to our face anyway.}}

Wade scoffed, softly laying his hand on the small of Peter's back and looked up at the ceiling where, the white text box would be. “You're so negative. Stop trying to ruin this for me. Petey likes me, Spidey likes me. What more do you want?”

{{It's not me trying to ruin anything.}}

The merc glared, gritted his teeth and let out a harsh whisper. “- And what the fuck does that mean, white?”

{{Think about it. Who you're with, etc. Spiderman is a hero, we kill people for money.}}

((Not anymore!! We've been sober for 5 months at least!))

{{Besides the point. The point is that Peter is too good for us. He's too nice, too pure hearted and we're just…}}

“Corrupted.” He finished, now looking at the smaller form pressed against him.   
{{EXACTLY. It's not me trying to ruin anything.}}

“You're trying to prevent Peter from.being ruined too?” Wade questioned, confused. “But, why would you care about that? You never did before. “

{{Never thought we'd get this far, honestly.}}

“So what are you saying? I've been trying to get this close to him for years and you're telling me now you don't want me to date him?” The merc hissed, hand raising up to Peter's shoulder. 

{{I'm SAYING, be careful. I frankly don't give a damn what you do normally but Christ try to keep it together at least a little. }}

Wade stared at the smaller man wrapped up in his arms, concentrating on the natural contours of Peter's face as if it would be the last time he saw it. He frowned, twirling the softened locks of hair between his fingers and listened to the soft buzzing coming from the room get louder, soft murmuring of words spoken so quiet despite how much Wade listened, no amount of quiet would help him hear. 

Wait.

That wasn't his shitty air conditioning. Or the shitty conversations held on the apartments next to his. 

That was…

“Aunt May! Where are you? This isn't fair!”

Wade nearly jumped out of his skin at the crisp loud voice that echoed through his apartment. Collecting himself he looked around, careful not to jostle the man in his hold. 

“Uncle Ben!! May is cheating!” A soft whiney child's voice called out once again to the nothingness that was Wade’s apartment. 

Struggling to understand where the voice could be coming from, Wade decided to communicate, ignoring the bickering of between the boxes arguing over whether or not the voice was a ghost or a sign of their insanity. 

What is this? The ‘Poltergeist’? “Uh...listen kid, I don't think-,” Wade started rocky, “-I don't think you've got the right place. This is-”

An older male voice called after the other voice, interrupting the merc’s futile attempt to communicate.“Peter, this is how the game works. You have to find her.”

Peter?

Wade looked down at the very much still asleep boy in his arms and froze. Was this…?

A whine was heard in the air of the mercenary’s shitty apartment. 

“But...It's hard! I'm no good at this! Can't you help me just a little?”

Is that a young Peter? But why was Wade hearing this?

He looked down at the sleeping hero and eyed his face, content, no wrinkle lines or furrowed brows, nothing. His baby boy just seemed to be fine with snoozing on Wade’s chest, unknowingly projecting his thoughts onto the other. 

“You're dreaming, aren't you, Peter? “He ran his hands through the hero’s hair, closing his own eyes, content himself with the situation despite mentally freaking about the fact that he was hearing the other's dreams.

A deep chuckle was heard and Wade almost thought his felt the feeling of rough hands ruffling his hair, well if he had any that is. Scrunching up his face at the odd sensation, Wade kept his eyes closed, seeing if anything else would happen if he focused on the sounds from the dream. 

The sounds of young Peter's laughter is what drew Wade into the dream, he found himself in the midst of a simple backyard, a white one story home and an old rusted fence line surrounding it. He heard a squeal to his right and saw a small Peter be tickled to death by an older man and woman who Wade could only assume were the people Peter was talking to before he ended up in the dream.

Which Wade still couldn't believe he was in by the way. He couldn't even hear the boxes speaking to him in here. 

The mercenary looked at the scene with a small smile, watching the small kid get up and take off running in his cape and Captain America pajamas away from the elderly couple. 

“Peter don't run so fast! You could get hurt- Peter!” The woman scolded from her spot on the grass still, the man from before having his arm wrapped around her middle. 

With a chuckle the man squeezed her close. “Aw, let him have fun, May. Kid needs a bit of exercise now and then.”

The woman, Wade now knew to call May, whispered, gripping onto the man's arm. “Yes, but after what just happened I'm worried about him. He's so young, Ben.”

“Young, but smart, love. He'll be fine. Look at him.” With a hand gesture, both May and Wade turned their attention to the small boy currently parading around the yard talking amongst himself, most likely playing hero with his towel cape and stick. 

Wade watched the boy that would one day grow up to be New York’s own Spiderman and sat himself down in the grass. He wondered if since he was within Peter's dream, if he was technically asleep too. 

If it was a dream, the calm and happy atmosphere made the man never want to wake up.


	10. Spider Senses Tingling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Peter seems to break open a bit so our Wadey poo can offer some help. 
> 
> Enhanced senses are a bitch, ladies and gentlemen. 
> 
> Don't do drugs.

WPW ch. 10

 

I don't own these characters, only the story. 

How much longer until the sex? Well, guess you'll just have to keep reading the dumb story to find out :p

~~~~~~~

 

((When do you think he'll come back?))

{{ How should I know? As horrible it is to admit, I am a part of you, after all. I don't know anything you don't, idiot.}}

((It's not my fault! It's just weird he isn't paying attention to us! He looks like he can't even hear us like everyone else..))

{{Maybe he's in Peter's mind instead of just hearing it this time. Perhaps dreams are truly an escape from reality as people tend to think.}}

((...))

((Look, I don't have time for your philosophical shit right now. It's bullshit, I just don't want to be stuck staring at the inside of of our own eyelids everytime this guy decides he's going to go inside Petey Pie’s head. I'm BORED.))

{{It just happened actually. He looked just as confused as we are.}}

((This whole power is new and confusing! Why did we get it and how come we can only read Spidey’s mind?? It's so weird and cool at the same time ahhhhhhh!!))

{{Very eloquent of you at the end. There is no explanation. We have it and we can read Peter's thoughts. There's nothing else to it.}}

((But WHY?? I can only think of a weird idea spawned from the depressed mind of an fanfiction author. But, you know ,that's ridiculous. ))

{{I wouldn't exactly call them an ‘author’. More like, wannabe storyteller, If you ask me, the whole thing should be scrapped. I mean, we're 10 chapters in and they've barely spoken to each other. They don't know barely anything about the other and the readers are eager for the romance.}}

((The sexy times!! Too bad! They need connections first and Petey still hasn't told us he's Spiderman. A relationship can't be built on lies!!))

{{Ahem.}}

((...we don't count, White!! We didn't ASK to read his mind. ))

{{Hypocritical. We may not have, but we certainly haven't told him we can yet, nor did we mean to tell him we were Deadpool. That was an accident.}}

((It still counts as a confession! We coulda played it off like we were a fan.))

{{Mmm. True, we could have. But, what about Peter being Spiderman?}}

((...what about Petey?))

{{Don't you think it's a bit cruel that we know before he even tells us? Or about the fact that we only started hanging out with Peter because we suspected he was Spiderman.}}

((GASP. THAT IS NOT TRUE. We LOVE Peter! Like we love Spidey!))

{{My point: They are the same person.}}

((White, we know!! The fuck are you getting at?))

{{It isn't fair to know something so crucial about him that he hasn't told us. We need to tell him we know. Somehow, before this situation gets out of hand.}}

((It's-...))

{{???}}

((It isn't like we aren't going to, he does deserve to know, but we want Petey to be comfortable enough to TELL us first. ))

{{You have no idea how long that could be, are we just supposed to sit here invading his mind for answers until he decides to tell us?}}

((Shh! White, discuss this later! I think they're waking up!))

Just as this was said, Peter let out a soft groan, eyes pinching as he stretched, accidentally hitting Wade on his forehead with his hand. This effectively woke the younger up completely and him jerking away from the larger male currently rubbing his face tiredly. 

“S-Sorry! I didn't meant to…” At the voice Wade looked up, former tired confusion replaced with happiness and just a hint of sadness. 

He smiled at how nervous Peter was. “No problemo, Petey. We all do weird things in our sleep, for instance, did you know you like to fondle in your sleep?”

The hero felt heat rise to his cheeks at the comment. “I...I do not!!” He sputtered out, crossing his arms over his chest. 

((God, if he does this when we tease him in the mask I'm dead. I've died and gone to Petey heaven.))

Wade chuckled, bringing up a large scarred hand to place it up under the younger's chin and pulled his gaze back to him. “I'm kidding, Pete Pop. All you do is make cute little noises that had me cooing up a storm earlier.” He poked the other's nose, watching it scrunch up and his eyes cross to look at the finger. 

“Somehow, I don't believe either. This isn't a very good start to this relationship, you know.” The small brunette teased, pushing the hand away from him with his own and just held it. 

He held it gently, running his fingers along the scarred edges all the while Wade simply watched, listening to the other but also thinking about the dream he had just been in. 

((Speaking of, did you know we couldn't see a lick of that, despite being in your head? Talk about weird!))

“That is weird.” Wade found himself saying aloud, despite the constant reminder of Peter beside him, who was still holding his hand. 

The smaller snickered at him,whacking Wade lightly on the chest, getting his full attention back on him. “How is it weird? That I don't trust your weird innuendos?” He chuckled, now laying his head onto the mercenaries chest. 

Said mercenary stared down and the bed head of unruly chestnut locks and strained to not start running his fingers through it. “Uhh, yeah. It is. A relationship is built on trust, Pete.” Wade felt ice run down his neck at the pure hypocrisy that he had just spewed but continued to stare at Peter's head with no further comment on it. 

“Haha, I know, Wade. And I do trust you. I mean hey, I trusted you enough to go to a complete stranger to help fix my phone.” He looked up, nearly knocking Wade on the head in the process, and gave stuck out his tongue.  
Oh, it was SO on. The scarred man raised a hairless brow and gave a half smirk. “- To a public place, filled with people. NOT alone. Not the best example.” He chuckled at the pout he received. 

“Listen, you. I'm not the most ‘trusting’ person-”

((OH we know, Spidey. We know BIG TIME.))

“But I'm really trying, okay? I hope I don't come off as aloof or dismissive, because i really like you, and I wouldn't be here if I didn't.” The younger sighed, tracing a finger along the path to Wade’s ribs and whispered. “It's been a while since I felt I COULD be in a relationship.”

((...))

((What's he mean?))

{{IF I recall correctly, there have been a few people that have died during a fight of Spiderman's. }}

((Well of course there have been, occupational hazards!! I'm talking specifically.))

{{That's not the proper use of- you know what? Nevermind. Specifically, there aren't many I can relay off the top of my head. There was one a few years back during a fight with Goblin. I think the police chief's daughter, maybe? After that fight he was absent for around six months. But, otherwise, there's not much to him.}}

“What happened to you, Peter?” Wade muttered after having listened to the boxes’ conversation. 

Like a nervous puppy, Peter bounced up, clearly embarrassed and put some distance between him.and Wade using his arms against the other's chest. “W-What?? Jeez, how do you always know what I'm thinking??” He laughed, strained with a hand rubbing the back of his neck. 

((BECAUSE WE CAN READ YOUR MIND, SPIDER-BOY))

“- Because I know your type. I can tell you've had some issues with dating, maybe just life in general. I want you to know that I'm here if you need to talk. I think you should.” He rambled off quickly, knowing of Peter's background with psychological tendencies thanks to his record. 

Peter looked at him now, eyes squinted in suspicion. “Why? Why would that matter to you any? You didn't know me then. “

Wade sighed, running a hand along the back of his head. “Because I know you NOW, Petey. And I want you happy, comfortable in our relationship, and I can tell that something, something BIG is holding you back from that. Look, I've had me some relationship problems in the past, some failed marriages-”

“-Marriages?” Peter interrupted comically. 

Wade waved his hand rather dismissively and grinned. “-Yeah, marriages. Had some issues with a demon/succubus. But don't you worry your pretty head, Petey. She's nothing compared to your sweet little face.”

Said boy just sat cross legged on the couch, looking over at the mercenary as if it was the first time he's seen him. “...What happened?”

The merc shook his head with a chuckle. “You're clever, changing the subject to my failed marriages away from your problems. “ He waddled a finger at the hero disapprovingly. 

Peter whined, leaning closer to Wade and bracing himself on the larger forearm and started shoving lightly. “But I wanna know! A DEMON?! Wade, that's absolutely crazy!”

“Well, it isn't really compared to the other people I've dated. Like Death, for instance. “ The merc grinned, enjoying the astonished look on Peter's face. “You'll catch flies if you keep that up, baby boy.”

‘Death. DEATH. I don't believe it, why is this man so interested in Spiderman, let alone someone as boring as Peter Parker?! The man's been married to a succubus. I can't even IMAGINE the sex life!’

The merc let out a laugh, throwing his head back while the boxes have flashbacks of the sex with Shikla. ‘Good times, until she stabbed me in the back.’ Wade thought before responding to Peter's thoughts. “In case you were wondering, the sex wasn't that bad, but not as extravagant as you're imagining, I'll bet. I mean she did kinda betray me and hook up with Dracula.”

Peter deadass looked sick. “What. You're kidding me, DRACULA?” 

Wade threw up his hands. “Okay that may be an over exaggeration on my part, but the dude looked just like him!” 

With a hum, the younger man nodded, pulling away to play with his hands. “-And the whole thing with you having a thing with death...that was an exaggeration too?” 

“Mmmnnnope. That part is 100% true. She's real and we've went at it before.” He didn't like how nervous Peter seemed to be getting about this subject, this was supposed to be about him, so he could open up more!

Peter looked confused. “Why aren't you still with her? Did something happen?”

Wincing, Wade added, “Yes. I can't die, Petey. I can't be with Death if I can't stay dead for more than like an hour at most.”

The smaller played with his hands again, staring at him with that look Wade now knew meant he was thinking hard about something. 

‘So he really can't die? I always thought he was bluffing or pulling my leg when we would be on patrol. Or just his healing factor was so quick like wolverines. Wow…’

Peter had said that last part out loud but it wasn't as if Wade was paying too close attention to that, Peter certainly wasn't. 

“Yeah, it's so good, I could be in pieces and my ole body will still be up and running in a few hours tops.” He patted his chest, gaining Peter's attention. 

“...so those scars… Are they from-”

“-They're from cancer, Pete.”

Peter looked like he'd been caught with his hand in the cookie jar and looked at Wade with such fear in his eyes. Not pity, fear. 

Huh. 

“C-...Cancer? But you said you couldn't-”

“I CAN'T. But that doesn't mean the cancer I had before I became like this is going away anytime soon. I can't die, remember Petey? You don't have to worry about me.” Wade placed a hand on Peter's shoulder, hesitant once he saw the younger's eyes follow it. “Okay, Peter, breathe.”

Peter was stiff under his hand, and his eyes seemed glossed over and unfocused making Wade extremely worried that he had said too much at once. Wade withdrew his hand carefully eyeing the smaller as he did, watching as he apparently shut down in front of him. 

((OH SHIT. WHAT DID YOU DO))

{{Mayhaps, cancer was a bit too much}}

“Peter? Pete, look at me. LOOK AT ME, Webs” He was scared to touch the other as he didn't even register the nickname usually reserved for his wall crawling, ass kicking self. 

But, Peter didn't listen, wasn't listening. Thinking of nothing and simply staring at the spot Wade’s hand had once been. 

“I can't hear…” The mercenary started, but faltered seeing the smaller's chest heave. 

((FUCK. Have our powers suit working??))

{{No. This is different. He isn't thinking anything, I think he's-}}

Wade placed his hands onto Peter's shoulders and not a second later was flung back harshly onto the couch with the sheer force of the words-

‘I CAN'T GO THROUGH IT AGAIN.’

((Oof. He didn't even touch us! What the hell?!))

With a grunt, Wade lifted himself up off the arm of the couch, rubbing the back of his head. “Ooh. Gotta a bit of power to that didn't yah, Petey?” He looked over, hoping for some sort of response, but all he received was the same dead-like stare and silence. 

Cautiously, Wade got a bit closer, eyeing him for any sort of movement. “Come on, Petey. Wake up, I'm here, you're here everything's alright.” He held out his hands to Peter's sides REALLY hoping that he wouldn't end up being flung back again for this. He took a deep breath noticing Peter had not changed and wrapped his arms quickly and tightly around the other. 

{{- a panic attack.}}

Immediately Wade had to struggle to hold on as a strong force nearly knocked him off once again. His ears near busted from.how loud the voice was coming from inside of Peter. 

‘I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T. NOT AGAIN. I CAN'T DO IT AGAIN. NOT AFTER MAY, NOT AFTER GWEN. NOT AFTER UNCLE BEN. I WON'T I WON'T. ‘

Each word knocked into Wade, making him struggle to keep his grip. Gwen? May? And his uncle ben? Wade at least now knows of who two of those people are thanks to the dream Peter had earlier, but why was it a bad thing? Why was it causing him this much stress to maKe him react this way??

What happened to him?

Nevertheless, Wade knew he had to try and do something. He couldn't leave Peter like this. 

“Peter!! Calm down! Everything is alright, you're safe! I'M safe! YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THIS!” He tightened his hold as the voice only got louder, effectively drowning out the boxes looking their minds in his own head. 

‘I CAN'T. I WON'T. NOT AGAIN, I CAN'T GO ON AGAIN WITH IT. NO NO NO!!’

The merc grunted with every forceful shove the younger's mind tried forcing onto him. But he only held on tighter, knowing the hero's body could definitely take it. “Peter, listen to me!! You don't have to worry about this anymore! You don't have to protect me or worry about me! Everything is fine, Peter!! EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT!!” Wade found himself yelling towards the end as the whir of Peter's thoughts made it almost impossible for Wade to hear himself speaking. “I PROMISE. EVERYTHING IS OKAY!!”

Suddenly, the whirring dropped down to a dull buzzing, and Wade found himself looking into Peter's scared, tear stained eyes. “Wade…?” He shook in Deadpool’s hold, seeming almost fragile despite Wade knowing for a fact that this man could lift up a car and crush steel. 

Once they made eye contact, Peter lost it, the tears under him and he cried into the merc’s shoulder. 

\- And Wade still didn't know why. 

He still didn't have any more answers than questions about why Peter was so sad and reserved. From his record, it said he had lost his parents. Okay, Wade gets that. He may not relate, but he understands. 

He gets that the death of his uncle was hard on him, but Peter deals with muggings and shootings nearly everyday as Spiderman and he doesn't act afraid or freeze up at the sight of a gun. 

He understands the death of his girlfriend and aunt must have been very hard on him. 

Had he really been holding everything in this whole time? That thought scared Wade and made him hug Peter closer to his chest, ignoring the snot and tears that were more than likely staining his shirt. “Peter...it’s okay. It's alright to grieve. These things just happen, baby boy.”

With a sniffle and a few hiccups, the smaller responded. “No, they don't! They happen because of me! You don't get it, Wade! This is...i just...when the bad things happen...they happen because of me.”

Wade rubbed the other's back soothingly. “Petey, you should know it isn't your fault. You can't control when these things happen.” He squeezed him tight in his hold, never wanting to let go. “You can't save everyone, Peter.” The mercenary found himself whispering, even as the other now stared up at him with wide, wet eyes. “You can't. I know you think you can and that you should but you… You just can't. It's not healthy to think it, either. You'll only hurt yourself more trying to. The most you can do is try your best and hope.”

Peter seemed to think on it for a minute, the tears having stopped but his eyes were still puffy and red. “Hope?” He whispered lowly. 

((Uh oh. That didn't sound like a good question.))

{{He’s upset. He's bound to have mood swings.}}

((Yeah but...MIND POWERED MOOD SWINGS?!?!))

{{I think that was our powers being overloaded, similar to when a high frequency sound is played around Spidey. Overwhelms us.}}

Wade tensed up, feeling like he had said something he wasn't supposed to. That's what Spiderman had always told him about the lowly criminals he always seemed to be giving second-third- fourth chances. Cough cough Black Cat and even Electro once! Maybe he just didn't like taking his own advice?

“Wade…” Peter's soft voice brought him back out of his thoughts once more. “I've just been...hopeful for so long I don't know if I can be for much longer…” With a huff, the smaller had let himself fall into Wade, effectively startling him. “I don't know if I can do it anymore. I'm normally such an optimistic person but damn, I can only take so much, you know?” 

The merc let his hand run through Peter's soft locks. “Petey…”

“-meeting you, was probably the best thing that's happened to me in a long time, you know? And I'm not saying that to be sappy or make you pity me. That is the LAST thing I want right now. I just....” Pressing his cheek up against Wade’s pec, he sighed, tracing a finger along the wrinkles of other's shirt. “Hah...I don't know.”

‘Maybe the fact that you can't die is one of the reasons I like you so much…’

Oh.

Oh, that's really fucking sad. But…

Score one for Deadpool. 

“Pete. Look at me. “ When the brunette finally did, Wade continued. “I'm not the best for this kind of advice, he'll I've got some issues of my own. But if you ever EVER want to talk about what just happened and why you're like this, I know we just met a few weeks ago, but I'm here for you.”

‘Whether you're Spiderman or Peter Parker.’


	11. The Secret Cometh Out, Does Peter is Gay?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally here folks, no not the smut, that's later;D
> 
> For now you'll have to settle with some drama, and a bit of fluff. 
> 
> AND PANCAKES-

WPW ch. 11

 

Eeeek I'm excited for this one!

*Shifty eyes* for no particular reason oVo

Also, sorry it took me so long, working 2 jobs- imdead 

~~~~~~

 

Peter had never slept over at someone's house before that wasn't a friend or family members. Yet, when he woke up that morning, the sun peaking through the broken down blinds of Wade’s apartment, he didn't feel nervous. He felt...relieved? Feeling the almost sore bags under his eyes, Peter concluded that after everything that had happened the night before, he must've went right back to sleep. Almost happily humming in relief at talking to someone, he shifted on the couch, only to realize he couldn't move a whole lot. 

Confused, he rubbed at his eyes, and waited for them to adjust to his surroundings and found the mercenary's broad arms wrapped around him like he was some kind of Teddy bear. He felt the tips of his ears burn from embarrassment when he turned to find Wade sound asleep. 

What were they doing before this? He couldn't rightly remember. Then again, Peter was never one to remember things when exhausted the night before. He tended to get a tad loopy when tired. 

\- He remembers this one time with Hulk-

The brunette froze when he felt Wade shift behind him, determined to not wake the other up, Peter stayed as still as possible and allowed Wade to practically hold him like a stuffed animal in his strong arms. 

‘I really should should eat more if I'm this easy to move around…’ Peter thought a bit irritably, staring up at the mysteriously stained ceiling, making up shapes and wondering what the stains could be from. 

((You're like a twink, duh! Of course you're easy to move. How hard is it to lift 80 lbs?))

{{- I think you mean TWIG as twink means something else entirely.}}

((...Nope! Pretty sure he's a twink!))

It took everything in Peter to not jump up onto the ceiling with the random voices suddenly loudly making themselves known within the room. With as little movement as he could manage, he looked around the apartment, confused when he had spotted no intruder. 

‘Weird. Maybe the people next door are being too loud? I know apartment walls can be thin, but damn.’ He thought, settling back into his boyfriend’s embrace. 

((Yeah, these walls suck! We can't even bang one prostitute without the crazy cat lady banging on the ceiling! What a bitch, let a guy bust a nut in peace!))

{{Wait…}}

Peter's brow scrunched up in confusion, his heart rate picking up. Okay, he DEFINITELY didn't say that part out loud. “What the …fuck?” He said, getting quiet when he remembered the sleeping Wade snoring without a care beside him.

((Fuck, indeed. I just said that!))

{{No, you moron. That's not what's going on here. He can-}}

‘WHO THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HEAD?!’ He willed his thoughts to be as loud as possible, utterly freaked.

{{He can...hear us.}}

((WHOAHHHHHHH. No way!! Only we can hear us!))

Peter Parker was many things, a superhero, a giant science nerd sure, but he never thought he was crazy! He blinked his caramel colored eyes rapidly and looked around the apartment, eyes eventually wandering to the scar covered arm of his...boyfriend? Yeah, boyfriend. 

Peter never thought he'd be gay either. 

-Well, Bi. But, that part of his life was still creeping up on him occasionally. Like, Wade Wilson, for instance. 

DEADPOOL to be more specific. Man was built like iron, sturdy and STRONG, AND Peter could feel his heart skip a beat everytime he got the opportunity to feel them. Like now.

\- he hadn't realized that during his thoughts he had been using his calloused hands to rub tender circles around the larger man's muscles on the arm around him, much to the boxes enjoyment in seeing someone like him become engrossed with Wade. 

((OHOHOHO- Petey, that's adorable. Were you raised to be sweet as sugar, or have you just ripened over time?))

{{- Oh I'm sure he's just as charmed as ever in hearing someone like you say that.}}

The smaller grew flushed, remembering he wasn't technically alone, and pulled back a bit from the anti hero. “Who are you guys?” He muttered lowly, eyeing Wade from the corner of his eye to ensure he was still asleep. 

{{No one. Yet someone as well.}}

Peter scrunched his nose up at that, confused. 

((We are thought boxes!! I'm WHITE))

{{Imbecile. I'M white. You're Yellow. Not that it matters, really. I doubt him hearing us will become a permanent thing.}}

((Hey, you don't know that! We could be Petey-bo-Beety's thought boxes now!!))

The man pulled completely away from Wade, using a couch pillow to substitute himself for the other and got up off the couch with a stretch. “- I'm starting to see why Deadpool acts the way he does if he has to listen to you two all day.” He muttered walking into the bathroom to clean up, his bare feet padding the dirty carpet with little heed. 

Ignoring the two bickering in his head, Peter turned on the faucet, wincing as the water was brown at first, then washed his hands and face, he used a somewhat clean towel to dry himself off and looked up into the mirror to admire his handiwork. 

Whistles were heard soon after by the likes of Yellow. 

((MMMMPETEY. You are an angel walking. Just look at that bedhead!))

Blushing, Peter lifted a hand and played with the rebel strands of his hair that refused to lay down with the rest and pouted. “Dammit. I don't have any clean clothes, so I can shower too.” He frowned once he saw how swollen his eyes were, that's right he had been crying last nig-

((YOUCANWEAROURS))

The man jumped at the sudden yelling from the voice in his head. “W-What? Yours? How on earth could I do that?” He placed his hands on his hips and furrowed his brows, making Yellow keen in his mind. 

{{WHAT he means is, you can use Wade’s. Who is: us. You can use his clothes.}}

((UHHUH. YEP. I recommend our tight fitting Spiderman shirt and Hello Kitty pajama shorts!!))

Peter huffed, shifting his weight from.side to side before rolling his eyes and walking into the older man's bedroom. 

Good god. All of the Spiderman fan shit strewn about it. 

The bedsheets, the blanket. The posters, the CLOTHES AND PLUSHES. 

The hero jumped back, a somewhat disgusted look on his face at the sight of a pair of Spiderman briefs hanging off the man's lamp by his bed. 

((Ooh! LOOKIT there's our spiderman wonder plush! We waited in line for hours for that!))

The brunette momentarily forgot his disgust and squinted at the plush, picking it up and turning it over in his hand, wincing at the squeak it let out. “Why?”

{{It was limited edition. Very rare.}}

Deciding not to question it, the hero threw it back onto the bed, much to the protest of Yellow, and padded over to the dresser and opened it up.

All of Wade’s clothes were SUPER big compared to his small frame, so he did end up having to wear exactly what Yellow had suggested earlier. One of his MANY Spiderman shirts and loose fitting Hello Kitty pajamas. He gathered the change of clothes into his arms and headed to the bathroom, rolling his eyes at the ramblings between the boxes, and set the clothes he had picked out onto the sink.

“Uhh...could you guys like...i don't know, look away or leave while I shower?” Peter's hands halted at the hem of his shirt. 

((Nnnnnnope! We don't even know how we got here instead of the big guy!))

{{Yes, it is a rather strange situation.}}

The hero squawked, pulling his shirt down as reflex. “You mean there's no way you can leave me alone to shower?!”

((Looks like you're stuck with us, Petey! Not that I mind that in the slightest~ Show us that pretty behind of yours already!))

{{Pervert.}}

Peter flushed, turning his head to the side. “You mean there's no way for you two to leave me alone so I can...get naked and bathe?”

((- And miss the sight of you NAKED? I DON'T THINK SO))

{{Again, pervert.}}

((OH like you wouldn't look, White!))

{{Right, I WOULDN'T, because unlike you, I have some cl-

Then there was dead silence in the small bathroom, with nothing but Peter's own breathing breaking it if he paid attention. 

“...Guys?” He spoke quietly, wincing at how his voice seemed so loud in such a quiet room. 

There was no response and it made the hero narrow his eyes in suspicion. “Come, on. If you guys are playing silent just so I'll get naked, I'm not buying it!” He said with a huff. 

“-Is that what it takes to win you over, Petey?” A deep voice suddenly came from behind him. 

Peter pointed up at the ceiling, still not turning to look. “Aha! I knew…” It was as if he realized where the voice had actually came from and his face surely showed it. Embarrassed and nearly tomato red in color. “...it?” 

The taller man laughed, deep and rumbly, making Peter's heartbeat a little faster. “Not that I'm complaining, I'm the type that talks in bed, so who am I to judge someone who doesn't care for the silence?” Wade shrugged, looking at the smaller man with mischief sparked eyes. 

“W-Wade..I uhmm...well…” He stuttered, looking anywhere but at the other man and fiddled with his fingers. “I promise I can explain, well actually I can't, not really anyway. It wouldn't make any sense if I tried-” 

As Peter went on and on rambling, Wade listened in on the boxes, silently wondering why he awoke to them conversing about a naked spiderman. Not that he was complaining about that-

((YOU JUST HAD TO WAKE UP, DIDN'T YOU- ALWAYS CAUSING TROUBLE, WILSON.))

{{As much as I agree with you, you're disgusting.}}

((WE COULD'VE SEEN SPIDERMAN NAKED IF YOU HAD JUST KEPT YOUR EYES CLOSED FOR ANOTHER FEW MINUTES!!))

“Petey, it's okay. I talk to myself all the time, no biggie.” He placed a warm hand on the other's shoulder and relished in the slight lean Peter did towards him from it. Small victories, right? 

Peter fiddled with his hands again, biting at his lip and nodded. “But- they were so…”

“-obnoxious? A big bunch of cricket raisin heads, a huge pile of steaming dog sh-”

“Wade, please.” The super interrupted with a short laugh, he placed his hand on top of Wade’s warm one and held it between his own. “I was…well I was going to use your clothes so I could shower.”

The mercenary grinned and squeezed the much smaller hand in his. “Perfect! You do that and I'll get started on breakfast! Pancakes sound good?”

Despite the slight flinch Peter did at the word pancake, he gave a nod, smiling softly up at Wade. “Pancakes sound great actually, I'll go ahead and get ready.” Peter shuffled a bit under the taller man's gaze before placing his hands on his shoulders and turning him around to face the open doorway and pushed. “Okayyyy, out you go, Wade!”

Wade whined, leaning back onto Peter's shoulders, knowing he could take the weight. “But, Peteyyyyy, I wanna see your perfectly toned tummy~” He laughed as he felt the smaller hands grip his shoulders tighter and Peter lay his forehead on Wade’s back for a second.

“Ouuuut- out out, no butts.” And with that, Wade was pushed out through the door with nothing but a small laugh from the other and the door closed behind him.

((We COULD'VE had fantasy fuel for decades if you had stayed asleep.))

The mercenary rolled his eyes as he walked into the kitchen to prepare breakfast. “Oh, come off it, Yellow. I can't help when I wake up, though I don't remember my dream, seems like the two of you do.” He brought out the ingredients and placed a pan on his stovetop.

{{It wasn't a dream.}}

((Yeah! We weren't inside your head, big guy!))

Wade’s hand stilled over the milk handle and he looked up at the imaginary boxes near the ceiling. “What do you mean you weren't inside my head? That's kinda my thing, you know? Merc with a Mouth, crazy, talks to voices in his head. Everyone knows me for that and tacos! You guys can't just leave me-” The man rambled on, laughing a bit at his own joke.

{{You're still doing that. We came back as soon as you were awake.}}

“Yeah, I know. How'd you two leave to begin with, and why the FUCK haven't you left yet if you could've?” He mixed the ingredients together and made the batter. 

((We didn't! We didn't even know where we were until Spidey woke up!))

Wade huffed pouring some of the batter onto the hot pan and rolled his eyes. “That doesn't make any sense.”

{{Neither does speaking to voices in your head. Regardless, for a short time we were inside Peter's head, hearing his thoughts.}}

((We already can hear his thoughts though…))

“This is different, Yellow. WAYYY different.” The man ran a hand over his half head before sighing. “Maybe it has something to do with last night?”

((You think so?))

{{I doubt there's any direct correlation to Peter's panic attack, but I think it may just be another part of this weird power we have.}}

Wade flipped over the first pancake and hummed. “Yeah, this sure is a weird one. Professor X ain't got nothin on me!” 

{{Speaking of Professor X, do you think speaking to him about this ability may help us understand how it works? I mean, he is more inclined to the mind than we are.}}

“Hell, not anymore it seems like. This power is so weird, it just keeps constantly changing, I can't get a feel for it.” Wade placed a few done pancakes onto a plate. “- and I don't think talking to X is going to help me any. If anything, it'll only cause more problems.”

{{How so?}}

The mercenary scoffed, placing butter onto the stack of piping how pancakes. “Like what if word gets out that Deadpool can read minds and go into dreams? People would flip out!!”

((What's that doctor patient confident thingey?))

{{He's not a doctor, he's a professor. And you mean what if SPIDERMAN finds out. What if Peter finds out you can read minds. I doubt you care about anyone else.}}

“You're right, I don't. But the risk is too high and…” The man barely heard the shower shut off before sighing. “...I'm not willing to take that chance.”

He placed more finished pancakes onto two separate plates, taking in the brief quiet of his mind and apartment and for once not relishing in it. “I don't know of I'll ever be ready to.”

{{You have to tell him sometime. If you don't and he finds out on his own, it'll make things worse.}}

There was a pause and Wade strained to hear the sounds coming from the bathroom. “It's already gotten so much worse. We're dating and I know he's Spiderman, but he didn't tell me, I'm Deadpool and he only found out because I was an idiot. I can READ his MIND and I'll probably never be able to tell him that because-...because…”

{{Because everything would've been a lie then.}}

((A lie? But we love Spidey!))

{{That's just it, we love SPIDER-MAN. Not Peter Parker. And Spider-Man knows that Deadpool likes him. So if Peter found out that: not only could we read his mind for going on a month now, we know virtually everything about his civilian life and deceased family. If he found out now, by himself he'd think we-}}

“-he'd think we only got to know him and love him because he's Spider-Man.” Wade finished with a sigh, setting the plates onto the kitchen table.

“Because WHO'S Spider-Man, Wade?”

Wade rolled his eyes and replied to Yellow. “Peter, duh. Yellow, what the hell, man? Weren't you listening?”

((That wasn't me-;;;;))

The mercenary froze and turned to look at the entrance to the hallway and there was Peter, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed and a strange look on his face. 

Wade didn't like that look.

The taller held out his hands and grinned widely, trying to hide how fast his heart was beating, though he was sure with Peter's advanced hearing he could hear it. “Peter, Petey bo Beety-”

The younger held up a hand with an annoyed face, not unlike his masked counterpart. “Stop. What did you mean? I thought you were joking before. Do you seriously think I'm Spider-Man?”

Wade studied the look in Peter's eyes, debating his answer because he definitely didn't want to freak him out into another panic attack or have him leave. 

((TELL HIM WE JUST WISH HE WAS- That'll throw him off!!))

{{- and most likely hurt him more if anything. Bad idea. Tell him the truth while you have the chance. The whole truth.}}

“- The WHOLE truth?” Wade muttered in response to White. 

“Yes. The WHOLE truth.” Unsurprisingly enough Peter heard him and had just assumed he was talking to him. 

Wade fiddled with the seam of his shirt sleeve and motioned to the pancakes. “Peter, why don't we have breakfast instead?” He winced when Peter's gaze turned into a glare. Now THAT was an expression he was used to seeing/feeling from Spider-Man. 

The younger walked closer, appearing very intimidating for someone so small and wearing Hello Kitty pajamas. Then again, this man could pick up a car no problem, so looks were very deceiving.

“Wade, I'm serious. What do you mean? Are you making fun of me or something?” Peter uncrossed his arms and almost appeared vulnerable until that hardened expression came back again. 

“Peter, look I'm not in any way making fun of you.” Wade started-

Peter threw up his hands. “Then why are you joking about this to your boxes?? I thought it was just a one time thing-”

Wade placed his hands onto the smaller man's shoulders, ignoring the slight tense muscle for now and squeezed. “Peter, I PROMISE you, we weren't making fun. We were debating back and forth because you DO seem like you fit the bill.”

The brunette raised a brow, scrunching his nose up. “Fit the bill for what?”

“Peter Parker. You are Spider-Man.”


End file.
